Chillun = children. The troubled bald “toxic” singer Britney Spears is set to leave rehab sometime this week, and some are saying that she’s made the biggest comebacks in rehab history! — Whatever that means — Some are saying she’s got her shit together and is ready to face the world again. TMZ reports that Britney Spears and K-Fed have even already come to terms on physical custody of the two kids, giving Spears back primary custody when she’s back on her feet. An inside source tells the site, “Britney has literally turned her life around.” Apparently, the turnaround for Britney has nothing to do with Spears’ former beau, Justin Timberlake. A few sites reported today that Britney Spears has literally begged Justin Timberlake to come and visit her at Promises before she leaves. Monsters and Critics reports that Britney Spears has smuggled a phone into Promises and has been making secret calls to JT.

A source told The Star, “She was hiding in a closet and talking to a guy named Justin, probably Justin Timberlake. She was talking to him about coming to support her at a group Alcoholics Anonymous meeting on Wednesday march 7 in Santa Monica. She kept saying ‘Come on Justin, please, please, please come!’ She was begging him!”

Whatever the case, I think she should keep her crazy ass in that so-called “rehab center” where they give her 24 cans of Coca-Cola everyday and listen in on her desperate phone conversations for at least another month. Who knows what she’ll do out here .. in the real world .. amongst people .. and children .. and our pets .. and whatever else one can think of… Think2wice people .. that’s all I’m saying, THINK2WICE!

R&B singer Ne-Yo has written a string of songs for troubled pop star Britney Spears, but may end up giving the tracks to The Pussycat Dolls frontwoman Nicole Scherzinger. The So Sick hitmaker, 24, has written tunes for Spears, Whitney Houston, Celine Dion and Rihanna, among others, but admits the Toxic singer may not get her hands of some of the songs he originally created for her. Ne-Yo, real name Shaffer Chimere Smith, originally said he would wait for Spears to deal with her demons after she failed to attend scheduled studios sessions between the pair earlier this year.

He explains, “We set up no less than four sessions for Britney to just come and listen to the songs I wrote for her. She never showed up. I think they want me to hold these songs that I’ve written until she finishes going through her thing. But a couple might be perfect for The Pussycat Dolls’ Nicole Scherzinger, so…”

More power to ya Ne-Yo! Just like in elementary school … you move your feet, you lose your seat! Except, in this case … you lose your mind, shave your head bald, go ape on a paparazzo’s car, and get addicted to coke (the drink you fools!) you lose your potentionally #1 hit Ne-Yo songs! Shame on you Britney, shame on you!

Naomi “The Walking Menstrual Case” Campbell began a week of mopping floors at a NYC warehouse today, as part of a court-ordered 5-day community service sentence for throwing a cell phone at her housekeeper. Campbell, 36, was also ordered to attend a two-day anger management course and pay $363 to cover housekeeper Ana Scolavino’s medical expenses over the March 2006 incident, which began when Scolavino failed to locate a pair of the model’s jeans.

“Hopefully, she’ll know not to come in high heels or anything like that,” Albert Durrell, deputy chief of the Department of Sanitation, told reporters at a briefing outside the facility. “Sneakers and blue jeans are a good idea. Wearing Manolos is not.”

Oh how I’d love to watch her do this. It wouldn’t surprise me if the crazy bitch beat the hell out of this Durrell guy with the mop handle for even looking at her the wrong way. He better watch his back…

FYI “Weight Loss Camp” is codename for “Fat Camp.” Anyhow, Hollywood’s favorite duo Paris Hilton & Nicole Richie are slated to counsel at a fat camp in Cali as a part of a new season of The Simple Life.

“They are going to be camp counselors at one camp in the Southern California Mountains,” says an E! spokesperson. “The camp has five different themes. Each week will be a different theme. And yes, one week is a weight loss/fitness camp. It’s not a fat camp.”

 I hope this isn’t true … by any means. But if it is, more power to them! I mean, who better to teach people how to lose weight than a retard and an anorexic bag of bones?

This isn’t much of a surprise really. Former B.E.T. Producer Dbrad has put up a series of videos, Confessions of a B.E.T. Producer, on his MySpace page where he talks about how things work at B.E.T. behind the scenes, who didn’t already know this? But anyway, it basically confirms that B.E.T. is a sellout and dumbing our [Black] culture down for lucrative royalties, no matter how many times people call into 106 and Park to vote their favorite videos – the videos will probably never see the light of day on account of the authoritarians who work there at B.E.T. (Black Exploited Television)…

UPDATE: This BET commercial, one of the examples as to why BET needs to do better then this, was spotted at C&D

He says, “106 and Park dictates to you what ten videos are going to play on the countdown. I don’t even know why people waste their time calling, all you’re doing is giving B.E.T. money, they don’t listen to you… Once Bob Johnson left the producers lost the ability to say, ‘hey! This artist is hot…’ Now an artist can only get on if forty-seven year old Steven Hill and his forty-seven year old Creative Director and his square video programing [BET] decides…”

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Oscar-Winner Jennifer Hudson has been given free Burger King meals for life. One of Jennifer’s first ever jobs was at the drive-thru window of a South Chicago outlet – and in thanks for the good publicity, the fast food giant has given her an endless supply of complimentary food. The company made the announcement after a recent spat between Jennifer and Simon Cowell. Jennifer responded to Simon’s criticism of her not thanking the show enough for launching her career. She said: “If I’d been any better at my job when I was at Burger King in my middle teens I wouldn’t be here either, so should I thank them too?” – haha, good one!!

In other JHud news, she is in line to play 1/3 of Aretha Franklin. No, seriously she is!

Hey hey stop making that face! I know you’re thinking “How the hell can she have a new man already? Ain’t she supposed to be in rehab??” Well yea .. you’re right .. she is in rehab but that doesn’t stop good ol’ Britney from manhunting! Apparantly, she has reportedly sparked a romance with Jason Filyaw, 33, the lead guitarist for the rock band, Riva, and they plan to move in with each other once she is out of rehab.

The pair are said to email and call each other constantly and are even said to have pet names for each other – “he calls her Sugar, Kitten and My Lady; she calls him Mr. Secret Underground Guy and J-Sun.” (how corny!) Britney adores Jason. He’s been a tower of strength for her at the lowest point in her life. She’s convinced Jason can help her through rehab because as an alcoholic, he’s been through the same thing.

Oh what a load of crap! Has she EVER been single?? And this guy is a frikkin “recovering” alcoholic! She always “falls in love” and ends up getting shitted on by some guy. There’s 3 things I can depend on in life: taxes, death, and Britney Spears being the dumbest broad alive…