Reality shows thrive on the drama that love triangles bring and with its ratings in the toilet, “Love & Hip Hop (New York)” was so desperate for drama that it decided to load up on two love triangles at the same damn time.
While Tara, Peter and Amina’s little messy love affair has produced a respectable amount of juicy drama, this Erica Mena, Cynthia and Rich Dollaz thing is too dry and faked to be worth a damn.
Look, Erica Mena might lick to have her hoo ha licked by a lady friend every now and again, but it’s obvious that Mena is still very much into men and furthermore that she’s still interested in Rich. So for all of her fawning and pawing over Cyn, we know that Erica is just biding her time until Rich sees the sign.
Last episode, after meeting with Rich in the studio to hear her new track, Erica was so pleased with the song that she sat on Rich’s lap, called him daddy and planted a big, nasty French kiss on him. Fast-forward to this episode and Erica is sitting in the studio with her boo, playing her new track for her. Since Rich is about to meet up with them in the studio, Mena decides to quickly come clean to Cyn about the fact that she made out with Rich.
Before you know it, the crocodile tears start flowing and Cyn is hotter than a habanero pepper.
Once Rich gets in the studio, tempers flare as Cyn confronts Rich about making out with her lady. Rich decides to have a pissing match with Cyn, which is weird since she doesn’t have a d**k but hey, we’ve gotta fill air time so why not.
Erica screams and hollers that Rich just needs to give them 5 minutes to sort out their issues but Rich refuses to budge and Cyn and Erica eventually decide to split. Meanwhile, that mediocre dance track that Mena was so pressed about remains unrecorded.
Mena later tries to make it up to Cyn by buying her jewelry. I know she’s pretending to be a man, but Erica’s gonna have to stop acting like she’s a Pimp Named Slickback. These player tactics just ain’t working out for her.
Cyn being the tough woman that she is, doesn’t fall for the jewels and reiterates to Mena that she’s going to have to choose between Rich or her. Mena swears up and down that Cyn is who she wants, but we all know that lie will fall apart just like Olivia’s singing career if it’s really put to the test.
When Mena’s dancing at a dance rehearsal later, Rich comes by to find out why the hell she’s hiring choreographers on his dime but ends up getting into a fight again about Cyn and the studio argument. What’s the point of signing an artist who never releases music and gives you nothing but headaches and drama? Wouldn’t Rich’s time be better spent trying to land songs on Billboard than this bullshit?
Amina Welcomes Peter Gunz Back into Her Heart
Some people talk a big game but can’t back it up. Amina, Peter Gunz’s wife, is one of those people. At the start of the episode, she meets with a friend and vows that she’s done with Peter Gunz and his high-yellowed shenanigans for good.
She even shows off her ringless finger, claiming she threw her wedding band in the trash.
But after Peter tries one last time to worm his way into Tara’s heart and fails, he crawls right back to Amina and promises her the moon, the star and the skies. A smart woman would’ve seen through Peter’s empty promises of love and marriage, but Amina is too blinded by the d to do the right thing.
Peter keeps calling Amina his “musical” soulmate in the confessionals. Which is a nice way of saying that they make good music together. That’s fine and dandy but it doesn’t mean they should be together. After all, Ike and Tina Turner could sing a fine song, but their relationship was still toxic.
Tahiry and Joe Inch Toward Marriage
When Joe and Tahiry first made their appearance on “Love & Hip Hop” their dynamic was tense and explosive. At this point, fatigue is starting to set in and rather than clash openly, Tahiry tolerates and swats Joe’s advances away.
Joe remains as persistent as ever, smiling at Tahiry like a Cheshire cat while he drops sexually loaded one-liners that he thinks will miraculously draw the centaur-bootied Dominicana back into his bedroom.
But that make-up on the pillow thing that he pulled a few months back really left a scar on Tahiry’s heart this time so she’s fighting it.
While hanging out with her sisters after twerk class, Tahiry swears to her sisters that she’s not sweating no Joe Budden. But when her younger sister asks Tahiry if she loves him, she readily cops to still having feelings for the guy. Her sisters roll their eyes as Tahiry tries to explain that despite her love, she’s not interesting in getting back with him. Clearly they’ve seen and heard this movie a few times.
Joe and Tahiry meet up to catch up as friends, and somehow, they end up confessing that they still love one another. Ah, yes. There’s no way this friendship could possibly slip back into boot knockin’ at this point.
After his encounter with Tahiry, Joe seeks out advice from his father Joe Budden Sr.
Strangely enough, Joe Budden Sr. seems to have all of the common sense that Joe Budden Jr. lacks. He advises his son to take the relationship seriously and PROVE his love to Tahiry rather than simply saying it. Joe agrees and tells his father he plans on proposing to Tahiry. Being the gentleman that he is, Budden Sr. politely tells Joe Jr. that he has to change his whole lifestyle and get serious about monogamy if he’s gonna go down that path.
Joe, however, believes Tahiry is the woman for him and he’s the one for her. Yes, that’s what Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston used to say about each other and we all saw how that ended.