When “Love & Hip Hop” (New York) made its return this season, I thought that the love triangle that would have us all consumed was the mess with Amina, Tara and Peter Gunz. But that silly bag of tricks has actually been pretty much wrapped up about three episodes ago.
The real drama and fire this season has come from Erica Mena’s lesbian relationship with Cyn, which is clashing with her ongoing informal relationship with Rich Dollaz. Erica claims she gave up the d, but somehow, someway, Rich Dollaz’s yellow snake keeps making his way to her garden.
While Mena has a thousand and one excuses for why she engages Rich, Cyn is tired of the excuses. Especially since she knows that the two one-time lovers have been engaging in naughty behavior in the studio.
But all of that mess is behind them and instead, they’ve all gathered at this nightclub to watch Erica Mena do her best Jennifer Lopez impersonation.
If I’m being honest though, it was more like Kiely from 3LW meets Evelyn Lozada of Basketball Wives. And if we’re gonna continue with the direct comparisons, Rich Dollaz with his penchant for promiscuity and his pursuit of pretty, but flopping female artists (Cassie) is most definitely the new Diddy.
While Erica certainly LOOKED lovely, her body wasn’t quite there yet as she still has her maternal pouch to get rid of.
The song itself is like two to three years off trend and the choreography is slow and lazy. I won’t even complain about the blatant lip synching because I probably would’ve complained more if the mic was actually on, so it’s nice that she’s considerate.
For about five seconds, after she steps off the stage, Erica basks in the glory of her onstage triumph.
But then Cyn comes crashing through the door and snatches her life after learning from Rich that she’s continued having sex with her one-time manager.
It’s not clear what has Mena more surprised, the fact that Rich told Cyn or the fact that Cyn believed it.
All hell ends up breaking loose once Erica storms off to confront Rich and he starts trying to physically fight Cyn and Erica.
Love can really make you do some damned foolish, crazy things. Rich is a grown man outchea scrappin’ with two Puerto Rican chicks like this is Mike Tyson’s Punch Out! SMH.
When Erica stops by Cyn’s job later to patch things up, Cyn plays hard to get and doesn’t take the bait. Cyn screams at Erica that it wasn’t her decision to get involved in Erica’s mess, it was Erica’s.
Is it permanent splitsville for Erica and her boo thang now? If schemin’ Richie has his way, the answer will be most certainly yes.
Yandy Gets a Call from Mendeecees
Baby, it’s been a long, long time since Yandy’s seen her man and frankly, we don’t know if Mendeecees is ever gonna see his way out of that jail cell.
In a heart-to-heart call with his fiancee Yandy, Mendeecees calls to tell her to kiss his boys for him, and encourage her to wait for him. Yandy vows to stand by her man but I can’t help but feel like she’s kidding herself.
If the charges Mendeecees facing sticks, he won’t be back anytime soon. And even if he does get out, is he kind of the character example she wants to show to her sons?
Yandy needs to have a long, hard discussion with herself about how she’s going to proceed in her life without Mendeecees.
Tahiry Tells Rashidah to Kick Rocks
These one-time BFFs have officially hit rock bottom and it doesn’t look like there’s any coming back from it. While attending Mena’s showcase, Tahiry bumps into her one-time gal pal, Rashidah.
Since someone has decided to propose to Ra, she’s feeling sexy, fancy and free. And apparently, she thinks she can help Tahiry rise above her station in life and ditch the trashy (in her eyes) urban magazines.
Tahiry, however, ain’t having it and she tells Rashidah that she ain’t changin’ nathan’.
To be fair, I’d probably have a hard time taking “respectability” lessons from a bitch that looks like a Chinatown imitation of Nicki Minaj.
Bye, Felicia.
Erica J and Saigon Live Happily Ever After
I don’t know if Mona knew the Saigon and Erica J storyline would dry up like this, but she should’ve cut them off before they wasted everyone’s time.
Supposedly, life after the shows end on a positive note with Erica J and Saigon moving in together and co-parenting with their son. Good for them, but I have a feeling we won’t see them on reality TV again. These folks are WAY too boring and they did not bring enough ratchet to meet our weekly quota. Better luck next time.
Amina Gets Her Man, Tara Moves On
The German chick who got played about 17 different times this season ends up with the result that she wanted: Reunited with her husband Peter Gunz. After Peter bailed on her while they went apartment hunting, Amina is furious. Peter has put their relationship on the backburner for so long and then just when he seems like he’s warming up to his marriage, he pulls back and pulls a bitch-ass move.
Conveniently though, Peter has a complete mental makeover and he realizes that he hurt both Amina and Tara. Since his relationship with Tara is completely irreconcilable, he decides to stick it out with Amina and Amina is perfectly happy being someone’s second-best option so she’s in heaven.
That girl ain’t hard to please.
The K. Michelle Experiment Is Over
After helping to build “Love & Hip Hop Atlanta”, K. Michelle was imported to New York to help breathe life into a severely broken cast. Unfortunately, K. Michelle’s addition did nothing for the show. In part, this is because K insisted on shooting with only a select few cast members, so she never felt integrated into the show.
To be honest, this season was super-fractured. More often than not, it felt like four different shows in one so it was hard for the cast to bond overall.
Mona needs to scale back the number of cast members and look for some real-deal people in the hip-hop industry in NY. All of these scallywags and wannabes are worn out, and so are we the viewers.