mimi-nikko

Mimi’s new boyfriend Nikko is rubbing many of her friends the wrong way. How long can Mimi and Nikko keep the love going in their relationship before it all falls down?

After last episode when Mimi barked in Ariane’s face with less than 2 cm between them, I thought Ariane might have decided Mimi was more trouble than she was worth. Instead, episode 8 opens with the two ladies seated at the table talking about the state of their friendship.

If someone got so close to my mouth that they could reach down my throat and snatch my half-digested pop tart from my bowels, I wouldn’t dare engage that person ever again. But hey, that’s just me.

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We ain’t friends if you gon’ bow wow wow on me for no good reason. Ol’ pitbull ass Mimi.

But yeah, Mimi sits Ariane down and starts interrogating her about whose side is she REALLY ON? Her’s or K. Michelle’s? Why does Mimi sound like a pimp? Does she own Ariane’s kutty kat?

Ariane says with her mouth “I know where my loyalty is,” but her eyes say, “Bitch, you crazy.”

The moment of truth comes when Mimi asks Ariane how she really feels about her relationship with Nikko. Ariane acts like she’s pulling no punches but you can tell she’s doing her best not to blurt out, “I can’t stand that asshole!”

So Ariane instead settles for saying that she feels Nikko is “inauthentic.” Right. Like he’s a Canal Street Chanel bag.

Mimi grimaces and nods her head as she mulls on her so-called friend’s assessment of her new boo thang.

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Later in the episode, Mimi’s crazy ass goes and sees a psychic who looks like she could be Fantasia’s birth mother. Grandma Barrino tells her that the Nikko situation is not productive and will lead to nowhere. Damn, Mona. Did you have to bury Nikko 6-feet-under that fast?

After the psychic trashes Nikko, Mimi asks what the future holds for her friendship with K. Michelle. The psychic says that K doesn’t care for her in her heart, although she acts like she does. Maybe the priestess is an undercover Keyshia Cole fan and that’s why she’s shading the hell outta K.

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Bringing everything full circle, we find Mimi and Nikko hanging out on the couch in her apartment as she explains her idea for her “Made” t-shirts. Playing off of Joseline’s name calling, Mimi has decided to turn the shade into a clothing line. She better cut Joseline a royalty check.

Nikko starts talking reckless, talking bout how he “coached” Mimi to succeed and how she’s riding on his train. The phrasing sends Mimi straight back to reality and she proceeds to check Nikko and his two ginormous Bug Bunny teeth real quick. How you gonna come on Mimi’s reality show and talk about you put her on?

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Joseline and Stevie Make Up to Break Up

It seems like in season 2 that Joseline and Stevie are in a committed relationship because homeboy stay by her side at photo shoots, nail appointments and oil changes. Joseline is feeling like she got herself a boyfriend and things but little does she know, Stevie J is up to usual ratty ways.

While Sleaze-o has been promising Joseline the moon and the stars, he’s also been scooping up discount Vizio TVs to impress Che Mack. To be fair though, Stevie HAS been somewhat honest about his communications with Che and he did try to broker a friendship between the two so that he can spend time with both of them without all of the vitriol and jealousy.

After spurning Che twice, Stevie convinces Joseline that she was unnecessarily harsh toward his new protegee and in a moment maturity and clarity, Joseline concedes that she unfairly took out her frustrations with Stevie on Che.

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Next thing you know, the three of them are sitting at a restaurant and pow-wowing about the status of their “relationship.” While Che wants to play innocent, she quickly and conveniently brings up the fact that Stevie bought her a TV. This whole stunt was so scripted that I could’ve sworn I saw Mona’s messy ass holding a cue card during this scene.

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Of course once Che drops that bomb, Joseline gets furious and fired up about Stevie’s betrayal. She gets her box braids together and walks out on Stevie and Che announcing that she has “things to do.”

Furious with Stevie for his latest creep episode, Joseline consults with her booking agent/BFF Dawn to whine about Stevie and his conniving ways. She acts like this is her first-time in the rodeo. Dawn is all too eager to throw Stevie under the bus so she can continue stacking those booking checks and before you know it, Joseline is gassed up enough to once again proclaim that she’s done working with Stevie once and for all.

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Joseline books a lunch date with Stevie to tell him this in person and being the pimp that he is, Stevie laughs in her face eggs her on. He even rips up her contract and throws it in her face while insulting her in the parking lot as she walks away.

“Your ass is fake. Your titties is fake,” he snarls. “You’re signed for life. Bye.”

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But you ain’t have a problem with the silicone Barbie all this time so how you gon’ act like it’s a problem now, Sleaze-o?

Don’t feel sorry for these two. They’ll be back together and cuddled up in an episode or two again.

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Shay and Erica Sharing the Scraps

For some reason, Shay is seeking relationship advice from the deranged and delusional DJ Traci Steele. Yeah, the same Traci who is so hung up on her ex that she handed that high-yellow fool $25,000, no questions asked, for a damn sneaker business.

Because Mona has to try to shoehorn Traci into the rest of the cast’s storyline somehow, she books a playdate with Erica and her kids so they two can talk about…Shay?

Erica rightly calls Traci out about hanging out with “popcorn hoes,” since she’s been chillin’ with Shay, and Traci doesn’t ever really explain herself. If the women who hang out with Babey Drew are so trifling, how the hell can she rock with Shay who’s been screwing her so-called friend’s fiance?

H-Y-P-O-C-R-I-T-E. And in that order.

After being spurned by Lil’ Scrappy so far this season, Shay claims victory as we learn that Scrappy is laid up in her bed getting a sensual massage from her. Guess who’s bizzack, biznaye?

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So all of that flexin’ that Scrappy was doin’ talkin’ bout Momma Dee is tryin’ to mess up his situation with Erica and here he is back with Shay.

After another screw session, Shay cuts some fruit and calls Scrappy over for a hear-to-heart about the fact that he asked Erica to marry him only days after rolling around the hay with her, Ms. Shay.

Damn, woman. How many times are we gonna go over this? You are a rebound chick. A warm body. A good piece of therapy snatch.

Erica is the one with the keys to his heart. You know he’s gonna tell you this and you’re gonna get mad, so why run through the motions again?

Well, that’s exactly what happens but instead of Shay taking the licks from Scrappy, she bites back and puts Scrappy out of her house.

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That’s right, Shay. Get your Mary J. Blige on. Put that bamma out and cry your eyes out in your walk-in closet!

I wonder if Momma Dee’s gonna come after Shay now for putting her “prince” out of her house. Y’all know how Momma Dee gets about people abandoning her baby boy and things.

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