“Real Housewives of Atlanta” Recap: Mama Joyce Takes Off Her Shoe, Threatens Kandi’s Assistant
Last season, Kenya Moore became the star of “Real Housewives of Atlanta” by acting a damn fool regularly. This season, Mama Joyce is coming for her spot as she goes on a rampage against Kandi’s engagement to Todd.
She’s been giving Kandi and her beau hell for the past few episodes and now, she extends the drama to Kandi’s assistant and longtime friend, Carmon.
In her mind, Carmon is creeping with Todd behind Kandi’s back. Considering how much she hates Todd, it’s kind of bizarre that she’s UPSET about that situation. If Mama Joyce really believes Todd is smashing Carmon on the lows, shouldn’t she just secretly encourage Carmon to whisk Todd away and get him away from Kandi once and for all?
Instead, she’s waging this strange two-faced battle where she hates Carmon for allegedly stealing Kandi’s man, and she hates Kandi’s man for wanting to marry her daughter. Why is Mama Joyce such a sticky ball of bitter?
As if Mama Joyce’s sourball persona wasn’t enough before, she triples the dose in episode 6 by calling on Kandi’s aunts (presumably her sisters??) for reinforcements at Kandi’s dress fitting. These mean ol’ hens get straight to work mean mugging and trash talking Kandi’s engagement as soon as they step foot in the bridal shop.
Fed up with the bitter old biddies brigade, Carmon can’t hold her tongue any longer how “terrible” it is for Mama Joyce to wish nothing but negativity and failure for her daughter’s engagement.
That’s when Mama Joyce quips, “Well you know him better than anybody!”
Carmon isn’t about to be labeled with no scarlet letter so she pointedly asks, “What are you trying to imply?”
Mama Joyce attempts to backpedal by saying, “It ain’t what I say, it’s what everybody else say.”
But Carmon isn’t buying it. “It’s not what THEY say, it’s what YOU say,” she fires back at Mama Joyce.
That’s when Mama Joyce blacks out and she jumps on her feet and reaches for Carmon’s neck.
And when Kandi came out to find out what the hell was going on, Mama Joyce and her gangsta-ass auntie friends lied on Carmon and claimed SHE jumped up at Mama Joyce first. Which is a damn lie.
That fight was just round 1 though.
When Kandi came back from trying on a dress, Mama Joyce was getting her Random Task on as she tried to throw her shoe at Carmon.
Now Mama Joyce has gone too damn far. After dodging Mama Joyce’s shoe assault, Carmon tells Kandi plainly that it’s time she took a stand against her mama. Unfortunately for her, Kandi has the spine of a jellyfish, so that ain’t never happening.
NeNe Puts Out a Slut-Shaming Rumor About Phaedra
With her acting career on hold, NeNe has little going on in her own life, so she decides to stir the pot in Phaedra’s life by paying a visit to her friend, former NFL player Chuck Smith. Apparently, homeboy dated Kandi at one point. (Who HASN’T Kandi dated in Atlanta…?)
But that wasn’t enough juice for NeNe. She and Chuck hail from Athens, as does her castmate Phaedra. Phaedra was one year behind Chuck and apparently NeNe heard a rumor that Phaedra was fond of giving oral sex to the boys in the yard. NeNe refers to her as a head doctor.
Now wait a minute. Didn’t NeNe make a big ol’ stink about NOT knowing Phaedra a few reunions ago? Now she’s out here throwing out smalltown dirt on national TV? I thought NeNe warned Phaedra not to play dirty? Guess NeNe plays her game by a different set of rules.
The RHOA Girls Break a Sweat with Cardio Cabaret
In one of the more light-hearted moments of the season, the ladies all gather at Kandi’s Kandi Factory for a sessions of Cardio Cabaret. It’s really just a hip-hop dance class which means we get to see these middle-aged women gyrate and twerk.
It was all good and fun, until Bravo producers and Kenya decided to get snippy with Phaedra over her post-partum body.
The cameras zoomed in on Phaedra’s mummy tummy, which admittedly was protruding, and Kenya made a snarky remark about how she sent her a copy of her workout tape or whatever to whip her back into shape.
Here’s the thing: Phaedra’s baby is THREE MONTHS OLD. Are these people insane? No woman who’s three-months post-partum is going to have solid-rock abs after that. I don’t care WHAT Kim Zolciak says, it just ain’t happening.
Admittedly, Phaedra probably should’ve shied away from that skintight jumpsuit, as it wasn’t flattering her post-partum body, but Kenya and the producers low-blows were uncalled for.
Speaking of Kenya, she was a superstar last season but she’s become utterly worthless this season. She spent this episode boo-hooing with her bleach-blonde aunt about her traumatic childhood. This was slightly interesting last season but it’s dry as toast at this point.
Her so-called African prince is the new Big Poppa and she clearly has no connection with any of her castmates. At this point, she’s dead weight who’s worth cutting loose from the show. Maybe Walter can rejoin the cast and bring some fun back to this dull party?