It’s been a wild ride, to say the least, but the madness that is “Basketball Wives L.A.” is finally over. The ladies sat down for ONE more hour of shade and side-eyeing and really, it wasn’t worth the time wasted, if we’re being honest.

John Salley was the messiest queen on the scene but thank god he was there, cause besides Bambi, none of these bitches had a personality worth a damn.

Salley opened the second half of the reunion by asking the ladies who they felt should leave the show. Most people wanted Laura and Gloria to bounce.

In fact, when Salley asked the audience to put it to a vote, the audience OVERWHELMINGLY wanted Laura and Gloria to bizzounce. You could see the look of hurt on Laura’s face but robo Gloria didn’t seem phased at all. Despite her claim that she MADE BBWLA, Gloria has made it clear that she’s over it.

The biggest tension of the reunion was between Jackie and Laura as Jackie confronted Laura over her sneaky decision to speak and conspire with Jackie’s daughter behind her back.

Instead of clawing back like she normally would though, Laura was contrite and apologetic. She said watching her behavior on TV made her realize that revenge is never worth it and that crossing the line with Jackie’s daughter was one scheme gone too far.

Oh. Okay.

Is that maturity and growth? No wonder these chicks are losing the ratings war.

Bambi kept coming for Gloria’s neck in the second half of the reunion and she really tried it when she kept asking Gloria where they could find episodes of her little web series.

Shade! Truth be told, Bambi did Gloria a favor cause didn’t nobody watching the show even know the title of that wack ass bullshit.

Another funny highlight came when one audience member asked the BBWLA ladies which woman they’d swap from their cast with the Miami cast. Guess who was the ladies’ preferred Miami diva? Evelyn Lozada.

Considering the TRASH Eveyln has heaped on the whole BBWLA, their admiration of her was surprising, but Draya, Jackie and Bambi were all on Team Evelyn.

Maybe she can have a guest role next season? It’s not like she’s busy these days anyway.

With John Salley moderating, in the second and final hour of the season two reunion of “Basketball Wives L.A.,” the girls reveal who each of them would like to see booted from the show and discuss where things stand after their season finale showdown in New Orleans.

Watch part 2 of the Basketball Wives L.A. reunion below:

[Yardie]

It’s time for all of the lies, deceits and trickeries to step out and into the light.

At the beginning of the episode, the trash pack of “Basketball Wives L.A.” gather for their last few days in New Orleans. They start the day out by going to a cooking class with a dude who looks like Andre the Giant.

They get to cooking, but the only thing Jackie is interested in mashing is Laura’s face, not no mashed potatoes. That’s because Chaney, Jackie’s daughter, has revealed to her mother that she had contact with Laura.

When Jackie confronts Laura about the conversation, Laura actually womans up and has a one-on-one conversation with Jackie about her daughter and their relationship. Instead, Laura gets teary-eyed and confesses that she didn’t have the best of intentions in speaking with Jackie’s daughter.

Who is this woman and what did she do with the she-devil we’ve been watching all season long?

It’s weird to see Laura go from ice-cold bitch to sniffling sensitive Sally. Nothing seems to faze Laura, not even her sister’s crumbling personal life, so why this?

Guess the Grinch really does have a heart after all. Or does she have ulterior motives? We’ll have to wait and see.

Swamp Thing Meets Swamp Rats from L.A.

The girls embark on a swamp tour, at Malaysia’s insistence, in an attempt to continue bonding and mending fences. Yeah. So far that hasn’t worked out so well, but maybe things will go better with the ladies playing in their element.

Laura, being the daredevil that she is, is psyched about feeding the crocodiles. You half expect Jackie to come up from behind her and push Laura right into the damn crocodile’s mouth. But Jackie is on her best behavior, so she keeps it cute and just side-eyes Laura the whole trip.

Sidenote: It’s amazing that the crocodile seems to have a better make-up game than Jackie Christie. Get yo’ life, crocodile.

Ratchet Mania on the Bus

America’s least wanted on this trip are the Govan sisters. Given their stank, holier than thou attitudes the whole season, you can hardly blame the rest of the ladies for having it up to here with their bullshit.

Well, everyone except Brooke that is, who’s chillin’ with these witches by default because she’s on the outs with her gal pal Draya.

Interestingly, the catalyst of much of the beef and surge of fury against the Govans isn’t coming from Jackie. It’s coming from Bambi. And she’s gunning for Gloria.

For reasons known only to Bambi, she’s really fuckin’ mad that Gloria dared to say she shouldn’t have an opinion because she’s a newbie.

So now, Bambi takes every opportunity she can to shove her boots down Gloria’s throat. She hollers at her about being a fake bitch, a loser bitch, a rude bitch, a dumb bitch, a lying bitch. Every kind of bitch. It’s all just … wow.

And Bambi doesn’t stop there. She’s running around talking about how her homies said they smashed Gloria in the studio, basically painting Gloria as a cheap trick.

Now true or not true, Bambi is doin’ the most at this point. Gloria hasn’t done anything THAT damaging to Bambi’s rep so going nuclear on her over this one slight seems a bit extreme.

Next up, Draya and Brooke wanna rehash their drama over this damn King photo shoot.

Who knew that women were this obsessed with receiving the honor of being an object of masturbation material for a thousand men around the world?

At the end of the day, both ladies have a point. Brooke is a little too damn invested in this King magazine cover. It’s one cover and it’s for a flop magazine. Get over yourself girl.

On the other hand, Draya WAS stank about the whole thing and she did try to minimize Brooke’s accomplishments because she x’d herself out of the shoot.

So you’d think these two could come to terms with this and move on. But nope. Brooke stay wanting to huff and puff about this damn thing over and over and over again. It’s become a subject that’s more tired than Jackie Christie’s wet ‘n’ wavy. Naw.

Draya Plays Sick

Now these are some schemin’ ass bitches. So Draya tells Bambi and Malaysia that she’s sick and she can’t hang with the girls. Brooke, Gloria and Laura, however, bump into Draya’s manager hanging around New Orleans.

This strikes the Govans as peculiar because, well, people don’t just randomly fly out to hang out in Nawlins.

So they theorize that he’s there on wor,k and that Draya’s playing hooky and isn’t really sick at all. So Brooke calls up Draya to find out what she’s been up to and Draya tells her that she’s been sick but that she did work today.

Draya then tells Brooke that she needs to talk with her about hanging out with the Govans, to which Brooke (who can’t even figure out how to pronounce these bitches’ names) says that she’s gotten to know them quite well and won’t be talked out of hanging out with them.

You told her, bitch.

Gloria and her conniving self then calls up Draya’s manager and gets him to confirm that Draya did a radio interview by pretending that she wants to do an interview with the same radio station as Draya. Her manager falls for the bait and Gloria smiles her devilish smile.

For someone who’s so concerned about keeping her private life private, Gloria sure enough does like digging into other people’s personal business.

Breaking Bad

The last two scenes of BBWLA devolves into a series of shouting matches. Brooke and Draya scrap on the bus with Brooke accusing Draya of not knowing how to run a business.

Huh? But Draya seems to be running Draya, Inc. just fine so what is Brooke talking bout? Matter of fact, didn’t Draya’s business get Brooke a spot on the show? Somebody done forgot where they came from.

Then Bambi throws herself in the mix by buckin’ on Gloria again. It’s hard to know if Bambi’s really mad at Gloria or if she really just wants to get into Gloria’s draws. Cause the way Bambi is all over Gloria’s clit seems more like a crush than beef.

Then these bitches broke bread one more time. Brooke and Draya had another round of the video girl wars and Jackie got all tearful about her daughter again and started pounding on the table about how she’s a good mother and how she didn’t appreciate what Laura did.

It was kind of a powerful moment. Then you remember all of the awful true stories that Jackie’s daughters shared with the world about how she pitted one against the other and neglected them. So clearly, Jackie’s interpretation of events isn’t matching up with reality.

It did, however, have Draya in tears, and her ass left her son to his own devices while she hit the strip clubs (allegedly!) so you know it takes a lot bother her spirit. But Laura sat there stone-faced like a gargoyle.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is a wrap on season two of BBWLA.

Thank God. This shit dragged on forever and was one-fourth the fun of “Love and Hip Hop Atlanta.”

If VH1 wants to bring this show back, they need to REBOOT the entire cast. Get rid of everybody, except for maybe Jackie. Her constant crazy is worth watching at least one more time.

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” all gather to revisit the second season of their hit reality show, and after all of the back stabbing done during the season, will there be any knives left for the reunion? You betcha!

In part one of BBWLA’s Season 2 reunion special, Jackie confronts Laura over her evil, conniving ways and Bambi rips Gloria a new one over her fake, fraudulent behavior on the show. She also takes it to another level by putting Gloria’s hoe-ish extracurricular activities with the Game’s crew.

Wigs will be snatched, and John Salley is on the throne mediating the whole cat fight.

Watch part 1 of the Basketball Wives L.A. reunion below:

[Yardie]

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

In this episode, the heat is turned up in the Big Easy as the ladies’ season-ending trip to New Orleans goes sideways as Jackie discovers that Laura has spoken with her daughter. Also, long-simmering beefs between Brooke and Draya as well as Bambi and Laura come to a boil.

Missed BBWLA Season 2 Episode 14? Watch below!

[Yardie]

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

In this episode, the ladies plot a trip to New Orleans, but when Bambi’s ire toward Gloria ruins Laura’s birthday plans, no one knows what to expect.

Missed BBWLA Season 2 Episode 13? Watch below!

[Yardie]

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

In this episode, the ladies head to the Big Apple to walk the runway for Jackie’s clothing line. And more than flash bulbs and champagne corks start popping when Draya bails on a party to celebrate Brooke landing the cover of King Magazine.

Missed BBWLA Episode 12? Watch below!

[Yardie]

The never-ending saga of drinks, lunches and drama continues to march on as alliances and allegiances shift on “Basketball Wives L.A.”

Laura is officially on the outs with everybody, except for her sister Gloria, as the clique rallies around Jackie to defend her from what they perceive as bullying.

Laura finally tries to explain herself at Draya’s party, but her argument really isn’t all that convincing. In her convoluted Blexican way, Laura essentially explains that her whole “Single, White, Female” schtick is just payback for what Jackie did to her last year.

Uh, okay. We’re sure that in Laura’s head, that little testimony would be enough to make people go, “AH-HA! Now we understand.”

But they don’t, so Team Jackie wins again.

Jackie Breaks the Dress Code

Can an old lady catch a break?

After barely making up with Draya at Malaysia’s birthday party, Draya gets into a tiff with Jackie over outfit, which is not in keeping with Draya’s order that everyone wear white for her swimwear party.

Look, Jackie’s hard of hearing and she’s clearly in the early stages of Alzheimer’s. She forgot, okay?

Draya should just be happy Jackie showed up with her wig on straight. Shit.

After Draya blasts her, Malaysia goes in on Jackie, accusing of her attention whoring once again. Well, duh. What else is Jackie on the show for?

Brooke Battles Draya Over King Magazine Again

These chickens are ash, no lotion, cause only birds would squabble and hate over a King Magazine spread.

While out with Gloria and Draya, Brooke receives the good news that she’s been selecting as the cover for the next issue.

Whoop dee damn doo. When’s the last time you bought a paper copy of King mag? Hell, when’s the last time you even went to their web site?

Anyway, after telling Brooke that she’s landed the cover, the Editor in Chief then goes on to explain about how he chose Brook over Draya in particular, because she was professional and easy to work with.

Draya immediately starts hollering at the phone and tells the EIC of King, Sean Malcolm, to stop being a bitch and to stop gossiping.

But it’s too late, Brook already sees her “friend” Draya’s true colors but this time, she won’t let them go. She calls Draya out for her lackluster response and unprofessionalism. Draya, however, is not in the mood to take etiquette lessons from Ms. Booty.

Could this be the end of the road for the Draya and Brooke friendship?

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

In this episode, good news for Brooke means bad news for her relationship with Draya. Also, Bambi reacts when Gloria shuts her down during an argument.

Missed BBWLA Episode 11? Watch below!

[Yardie]

Laura might have bitten off more than she could chew on Monday night’s episode of “Basketball Wives L.A.” You see, the conniving, older Govan sister decided to up the stakes in her manipulation game with Jackie Christie by meeting up with Jackie’s estranged daughter, Chantel Christie.

Yes, Chantel DID call Laura up, so it’s not as if Laura exactly went chasing after the young woman and forced her to spill all of her family secrets. But still, Laura was licking her chops as soon as Chantel reached out and Laura couldn’t wait to turn the conversation into something that could be used in her campaign against Jackie.

Watch a clip of the meeting that went down between Laura and Chantel:

The backlash has hit hard, and for once, the viewers aren’t coming at Jackie. No, this time the viewers are unloading on Laura and Chantel.

Many viewers feel that Laura’s mind games with Jackie have crossed the line, and that manipulating Jackie’s children is beyond the pale.

Others are blasting Chantel for being so carelessly disloyal to her family. Her mother warned her that Laura did not have good intentions and yet, Chantel couldn’t wait to trot on over and air out all of the family’s dirty laundry.

So now, both Laura and Chantel have been forced to go to the Tweets and make peace with the world.

Here are Chantel’s tweets first:

Not that I owe you viewers any explanation. But I will address this for once and for all.

— Chantel Christie (@faithlovewisdom) November 13, 2012

I was in a bad place in MYlife. Was it right? No. Was it “all lies”? No. Was it 4 “publicity”? No. Did I kno where Laura was coming from? NO

— Chantel Christie (@faithlovewisdom) November 13, 2012

Do I regret it? I regret airing my personal life out 2 sm1 who, I now feel, had malicious intent. I regret addressing it publicly, at all.

— Chantel Christie (@faithlovewisdom) November 13, 2012

When all this “reality” shit is over. When the camera cuts, and production wraps… That is still my Mother.

— Chantel Christie (@faithlovewisdom) November 13, 2012

And we have, and will continue to, mend our relationship BEHIND CLOSED DOORS, not for a million ppl to watch, dissect and judge.

— Chantel Christie (@faithlovewisdom) November 13, 2012

@jackiechristie, I love you. & I’m not sure how, but as a FAMILY, I’m sure we’ll get through this. If you’re ready, I’m willing.

— Chantel Christie (@faithlovewisdom) November 13, 2012

Whew! Jackie and her daughter sound like they have a black version of Dina and Lindsay Lohan’s relationship. Shit is exhausting.

Laura, meanwhile, hit up Twitter to say she was sorry for HOW she went about getting revenge on Jackie, but not really for plotting revenge in the first place. Kind of like when someone doesn’t apologize for what they said, but “how” they said it.

I can admit when I’m wrong…was it the best thing to do? NO. Should I have thought of another way to get my point across. YES. #BBWLA

— Laura Govan (@LauraMGovan) November 13, 2012

U live and U learn. Stay tuned. #BBWLA

— Laura Govan (@LauraMGovan) November 13, 2012

Laura made the mistake in assuming that the viewing audience’s hatred for Jackie was unsatiable. Unfortunately for her, she had to learn the hard way that Jackie Christie actually could come off as a victim on reality TV.

So yeah, Jackie Christie comes out of this whole situation smelling like roses while Laura and Chantel look like the worst kind snakes to ever slither on earth.

Don’t sleep on that old goat Jackie Christie. Laura Govan was yucking it up with all them bitches for the first few episodes, but in true Jackie fashion, Mrs. Christie has succeeded in turning everyone against Laura.

WHOOP! THERE IT IS!

Truth be told, it’s hard to know which woman is more villainous, between Jackie or Laura. Both women have proven to be ruthless, deceptive and misleading. In fact, if they weren’t so self-serving, they’d probably make wonderful double agents in the CIA.

However, at this point, we might just have to go with Laura as being the meaner of the two, cause this ol’ Skeletor lookin’ broad is runnin’ around trying to fuck around with Jackie’s kids. Now Jackie Christie deserves a lot of things, but if you have evil intentions, there’s no need to go after the young.

Unfortunately, Chantel (aka Channy) doesn’t know any better. So against her mother’s advice, Channy runs off and meets with Laura the Snake to spill all of her family business. Baby, no.

As Laura grins her Joker smile, Channy explains how Jackie pitted her against her darker, fatter sister and says that her mother is fame-hungry, phony and conniving. In fact, she talked about her mother like she was a flea-ridden dog. Hot damn. Jackie must’ve REALLY fucked up to have her own daughter selling her out so cheaply to Laura fucking Govan.

Hot mess mothers like Mama Jones get more respect from their children than Channy is showing to her mother.

After lapping up all of the good dirt, Laura saunters off with Channy knowing that her covert mission has been successful. Now, she just needs to find the right opportunity to throw this humiliating tidbit right back in Jackie’s face.

But let’s get back to Jackie’s successful comeback campaign.

Jackie Makes It All Good

Unlike any of the other women on the show, Brooke actually threw down with Jackie Christie and snatched her weave in the last episode. Once Jackie saw that Brooke was the real deal, she tried to back down but it was way too late. So now, here Jackie comes groveling for forgiveness.

Brooke naively buys into Jackie’s phony act and before you know it, the two of them have decided to gang up on Laura Govan. Damn, it takes a real scoundrel to turn an enemy into an ally within such a short timespan.

Soon after, Bambi approaches Brooke about her feelings about Laura’s spiteful behavior and boom, yet another alliance is formed. There’s just one more piece of the puzzle at this point, and Malaysia makes the connection happen as she arranges for Jackie and Draya to meet on the floor at her roller rink party. Against her better judgement, Draya decides to forgive Jackie and contemplates Mrs. Christie’s offer to walk down the runway at her show during Fashion Week in NY.

Laura, your fate has now been sealed. With every girl solidly behind her, Jackie launches her attack as she has Brooke and the girls confront Laura about her scheming ways.

The formerly thick woman plays coy and tells the girls that her fake behavior toward Jackie has nothing to do with them, but that line of reasoning doesn’t really hold up and before Laura knows it, she’s basically run out of Malaysia’s party by the girls.

Do you see God? He quickly turned Jackie from the reviled to the redeemed. Laura better watch the throne, cause Jackie Christie don’t play dat.

Laura Licks Her Wounds

After getting her ass handed to her by the gals, Laura remembers that she has a sister to call up and bitch to. Even though she doesn’t bother to show her sister the same support when her life goes to shit, like when her husband was recently arrested. But hey, bygones are bygones and stuff.

So Laura meets up with her younger sis and she goes over the juicy meeting she had with Jackie’s daughter and debriefs her on the showdown that happened at Malaysia’s birthday party. Once Gloria has been properly indoctrinated, she goes out into the field to push the new agenda.

Gloria starts with Draya, who she meets up with to discuss the issue at hand. Draya attempts to plead to Gloria’s moral sensibilities but Gloria ain’t hearing it. She tells Draya that if Jackie has a problem with the way Laura is treating her than she needs to take it up with Laura, not the girls.

At this point, Draya realizes she’s dealing with a chimera of stupidity and moral corruption, so she writes Gloria off along with her sister. There’s just no saving some folks from themselves. And when Draya, a woman who’s been accused of criminally neglecting her own son, starts passing moral judgement on you, you know you’re doing some dirty, foul shit.

It’s amazing, but only Laura has done what Jackie herself couldn’t do: Make Mrs. Christie into someone to be rooted for.

Shaunie O’Neal is somewhere sitting on an expensive couch going: I told y’all them Govan bitches was bad news.

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

In this episode, it’s hell on wheels at Malaysia’s 80′s-themed roller skating party when Laura is confronted about her treatment of Jackie. Also, Gloria shoots an explosive scene from her web series and the girls discuss an upcoming trip to Fashion Week in NYC.

Missed BBWLA Episode 10? Watch below!

[Yardie]

It’s hard to tell who the real villain is this season of “Basketball Wives L.A.” Between Jackie and Laura’s schemes, it’s like trying to decide if Hitler or Stalin is crueler. And this latest episode does a pretty good job of damning both women for their calculating, conniving ways.

The episode opens up on a serious note as Jackie attempts to stage a surprise therapy session with her daughters, Chantel and Takari.

Unfortunately, Jackie’s detachment from reality blinds her to the fact that she is incapable of recognizing fault. During the confessional sessions, Jackie repeatedly states that she’s nervous about what her daughters will say but promises that she’ll listen and be receptive.

So what happens when Chantel tells her mother that she feels like she’s inauthentic at times and that she thinks that Jackie could’ve been a better mother if she were more hands on in their childhood, instead of letting grandma do all the work?

Jackie shuts her down. All the way.

“I’m thinking oh my God. There was food in the house, heat in the house, grandma’s down the hall, that sounds like a damn good mother to me,” Jackie said. “Now if I didn’t hear something a certain way or I didn’t jump when you thought I should jump or I didn’t cry when you thought I should cry, that doesn’t constitute a bad mother. And I don’t wanna be sitting here listening to some nonsense.”

What happened to be open-minded and listening? Damn.

In the end, things get so heated that the therapy session is scrapped and the girls leave their mother’s house after a complete meltdown. Which puts poor Doug Christie in charge of trying to clean up Jackie’s mess.

But the family feud doesn’t end there. When Malaysia, Bambi and Laura head up to Seattle to hang with Jackie and her family, the conversation of her daughters pops up, and Laura, sensing an opportunity to dig her fangs in, asks Jackie if she can speak to Jackie’s daughters.

If Satan had an evil mistress, Laura would be it.

At this point, Bambi has chosen sides and she’s on Team Jackie all the way and is not feeling the way Laura’s playing both sides against each other. But then again, Bambi wasn’t around for all the drama last year, so her opinion of Jackie might be different if she’d experienced what Jackie was serving last season.

Bambi and the Middle-Aged Beast

If Bambi is riding for any other bitch on this show besides Malaysia, it’s definitely Jackie. When she decides to expose Laura for the snake in the green grass that she is, Lauara pretty much blinks and smiles at Bambi, telling her she’ll understand somewhere, somehow.

Laura tries to explain her motives and behaviors but she pretty much juste wants to exact some twisted form of revenge.

But Bambi or no Bambi, Jackie senses something is off, so she plays defense and decides to limit her time with Laura. That, ladies and gents, is the smartest move Jackie’s made all season long.

Lesbians Gone Wild

While Jackie and ‘em hang out in Seattle, Brooke, Draya and Gloria are left to their own devices. And Draya, being the thirsty whore that she is, opts to take Brooke out to a lesbian bar. Because Draya is a guru on the scene apparently.

During this segment, Draya and Brooke giggle and drink as Draya probes Brooke about any past experiences she may have had with women. Within seconds of Draya turning her back, Brooke is swarmed by lesbians who are then inviting to drink with the crew.

Who knew? Lesbians are into ginormous asses too.

But get this, later on, Brooke and Draya decide to go boxing and meet up with professional boxer Victor Ortiz.

Draya makes quick work of the situation and tries to flirt her way into Victor’s bed. First off, who the hell wears a damn halter top to boxing lessons? Was Draya purposely trying to put her melons on display?

Furthermore, why did Draya insist on Victor removing his shirt, which prompted lots of “oohs” and “ahhhs” from the so-called lesbian of the gang. Draya, this bisexual thing is barely holding water. We don’t believe you, you need more people.

A Section About Gloria

There was some off-camera drama with Matt Barnes, Gloria’s fiance, that consumed Gloria this episode. But we didn’t actually get to SEE any of it because, well, Gloria sucks. So yeah, no more text will be wasted on this non-entertaining, non-factor.

Laura’s Horns Start to Show

After Bambi spills the beans about Laura’s two-faced friendship to Jackie, Mrs. Christie takes matters into her own hands. She confronts the beast head on and asks Laura about the things she heard from Malaysia and Bambi.

Laura never denies what she said, but she downplays it. And Jackie, surprisingly swallows all of Laura’s bullshit and takes Laura at her word when she says that she is interested in building a friendship with Jackie.

Promptly after that, Laura meets up with her sister and Malaysia and starts trash talking Jackie all over again. Laura’s rationalization for her behavior runs something like this: Jackie was fake to me first, so now I’m getting her back.

Uh, ok. That might’ve been fun, if Laura wasn’t so OFF herself. Laura’s campaign against Jackie comes across as bizarre and detached.

As a viewer you end up wondering what meds Laura hasn’t been taking rather than screaming, “YEAH, BITCH! How you like them apples?!”

Maybe Laura should spend less time trying to be BBWLA’s Cruella DeVil and more time being a mother and a wife.

Jackie Christie may be evil, but by trying to fight fire with fire, Laura has become indistinguishable from Jackie’s nefarious soul.

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

In this episode, Jackie’s suspicious of Laura’s desire to speak with her daughters while in Seattle … and Draya, Brooke and Gloria’s good time back in L.A. is interrupted by news of Matt’s arrest.

Missed BBWLA Episode 9? Watch below!

[Yardie]

Jackie Christie has been dancing with wolves all season long on “Basketball Wives L.A.” but in this episode, one of the she-wolves decided showed bare her teeth. Jackie’s bark was real loud but once Brooke got all up in that grill, Jackie Christie’s voice got real quiet and she was backpedaling like her name was Lance Armstrong.

You see, Jackie talks a big game. Yes, she’s quick to throw on a pair of sneakers and act like she’s gonna put hands on somebody, but when push comes to shove, Jackie knows she’s not built for that kind of scrapping.

WATCH: “Basketball Wives L.A.” Season 2 Episode 8

So when things got ugly with the girls over at Laura’s mixology bullshit or whatever fake job they had to line up for her to make it look like she earns her own money for a living, Jackie had to figure out her game plan real quick.

Unfortunately, Jackie didn’t think fast enough because toward the end of the episode, Jackie’s weave ended up damn near snatched and her pink headband was all twisted up.

How Jackie and Brooke Got Caught Up

It’s no secret that Jackie can have a slick mouth. But who knew that big booty Brooke was a damn street fighter?

In Brooke’s defense, she kind of had a rough day before Jackie got on her bad side. You see, Malaysia and Bambi’s tomfoolery got Brooke’s blood pressure up right before Jackie stepped into the picture.

Brooke was tired of all the gossiping and sniping behind her back, so she confronted Malaysia about the snarky conversation they had when she invited Malaysia to her birthday party.

Brooke didn’t like the fact that Malaysia was playing games by asking if Brooke’s “boyfriend” was going to be there. She also tried it by bringing Bambi to the party, knowing damn well that they got beef.

Malaysia claims that she only wanted to broker peace, but we all know that’s bullshit because she said from the jump that she was sideeyeing Brooke and holding it down for Team Bambi from the jump.

So when Malaysia says she didn’t mean to insult Brooke, she’s fibbing cause she and Bambi were yucking it up when Brooke called to invite her in the first place. We seen the footage, so there’s no reason to lie.

So when Brooke confronts Malaysia at Laura’s thing, she pushes but walks it back a bit once voices start getting raised. Perhaps she sensed that a two-on-one battle wouldn’t go down so nicely because Brooke says that she believes Malaysia is sincere and hugs it out.

After that peace is brokered, in walks trouble.

Yes, that is Draya dressed as Jackie. Give the girl credit, it’s not Halloween yet but she pulled off one hell of a costume.

The wet’n’wavy wig and the long fingernails like Coko from SWV were the best. But Jackie, as you can see from the photo above, was NOT AMUSED.

So she promptly got up and announced that she was going to dress as Draya.

Which apparently means she’s going to show off her flabby, middle-aged figure in her Body Magic. Good grief. We weren’t ready for Jackie’s jelly.

Laura and her white bar tender friend for SURE, weren’t ready for Jackie’s jelly.

Yeah. Too much.

So Jackie and Draya go back and forth, trading insults and then Jackie whips out a bottle of pepper spray. This immediately sets Brooke off as she’s like, “WTF? You ain’t gonna get no pepper spray up in my face!” Jackie pretty much says, “Yes, I will. Deal with it, bitch.”

From that point on, it’s on like Donkey Kong. Brooke gets in Jackie’s face as the two argue about whether Brooke would step in if Jackie and Draya got into a fight.

Brooke says she would “peel” Jackie off of Draya and Jackie denies Brooke can back up her claims. As we saw in the end result above, Jackie picked the wrong one to mess with. Hot damn.

The lamest part about all of this though was the unwarranted censorship by VH1. As a result of the fallout over the violence from BBW star Evelyn Lozada, BBWLA’s producers took a heavy hand in editing the fight between Brooke and Jackie.

That means we didn’t see any of the blows land actually land and all we got was a split-second shot of the aftermath, with Brooke’s shirt torn and Jackie’s wig shifted.

WTF? You can’t decide to grow a moral conscience in the middle of the damn season. Either show the dirty reality TV goods or just cancel the damn show. This is not fucking Masterpeice Theater. We ‘re here to see hoodrats do hoodrat shit, so please, VH1, don’t try to civilize these bad girls.

Bambi Bites Back

After playing it cool in the background for much of the season, Bambi really starts to step out with the girls in this episode. First, she finally hashes things out with Brooke about the whole ex-boyfriend thing.

To be honest, it was rather anticlimactic and not worth following.

But an encounter that was worth documenting is the spat between Bambi and Laura in the park. Apparently, in Compton, inviting someone to the park is akin to booking a boxing match.

And Bambi came ready to spar. Laura shied away from direct conflict but Bambi didn’t take to Laura’s feigned timidness too well.

Bambi, who apparently feels close to Jackie, feels that Laura is untrustworthy because she’s clearly stringing Jackie along. Ok, she’s right, but why on earth does Bambi feel so inclined to protect Jackie from her enemeies?

She’s just a crazy old woman with way too much time on her hands. If Jackie DIDN’T like the abuse that she suffers at the hands of Laura, she wouldn’t keep coming back for more. So she needs to butt out.

Bambi’s real talent lies in her hair game anyway. This episode she blew us away with her soft, feathered Farrah Fawcett locks and later transitioning to her sistah-girl Poectic Justice  braids in the next scene.

Who’s paying Bambi’s wig bill for real? These don’t look cheap at all. Kim Zolciak from Real Housewives of Atlanta would probably scoop up one of these.

The other fun thing about Bambi: When she wasn’t fighting with women, she was busy making out with them.

Malaysia and Bambi met up with Draya for drinks to talk about, who else? Jackie. But things got steamy when Malaysia dared the two part-time bisexuals to give each other a kiss. What resulted seemed like the start of a bad black porno, but let’s be real: We couldn’t change the channel either.

Draya sure knows how to make friends. Now if she just made out with Jackie, we’re pretty sure be a-ok too.

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

READ: “Basketball Wives L.A.” Recap – Jackie and Brooke Get Into a Girl Fight

In this episode, a surprise blowout (read: FIGHT!!!) at Laura and Gloria’s mixology event shocks the group, and Jackie and Doug Christie’s trip to Seattle gets off to a rough start when Jackie and her daughters get real during a visit with a family therapist.

Missed BBWLA Episode 8? Watch below!

[Yardie]

Even though Jackie Christie‘s been married 17 times before, her old ass can’t help but act like a blushing, virgin bride. We have to ask: Should you REALLY be wearing white for your 17th wedding? Cause the white dress is supposed to be a symbol of purity, and we all know that Jackie’s about as pure as New York City sewage water.

So the weird thing about Jackie’s ridiculous wedding ceremony, besides the fact that she does it every year, is that she’s somehow dedicating it to all of the gays and lesbians. (Is she shoving it in their faces because she’s been married over a dozen times, and they have to fight for marriage rights?)

But we don’t actually see any gay or lesbian people at the wedding, other than the go-go dancers that Jackie has hiring to shake their asses on stage and in cages.

But you can’t tell this crazy bitch Jackie nothing. She’s got her rainbow tattoo on her flank and she thinks she’s Lady Gaga.

In the spirit of a homosexual night out, Laura Govan, one of Jackie’s bridesmaids, comes dressed looking like an extra from the “Rocky Horror Picture Show.” She figures that she’d come dressed in costume since the event was made for fabulous people.

It was, of course, loaded with shade because the drag costume was Laura’s way of saying, “Yeah, I’m here but I don’t take this shit not one bit seriously.” And really, why should she? The only thing Jackie takes seriously is her reality TV street cred. Everything else is negotiable.

The After Party

You know what the problem with BBWLA is? They have an entire hour to fill. VH1 should’ve cut this season down to half an hour because the filler is smothering the damn entree.

Before Jackie’s wedding happens, Brooke, Malaysia and Draya meet to talk about what will happen at Jackie’s wedding. After Jackie’s wedding happens, Laura, Draya and Malaysia meet to talk about what happened at Jackie’s wedding. Is this really life? Can these bitches find something new to talk about?

Nope. So on and on they go, dragging out the inevitable reunion between Jackie and Draya.

It’s not worth trying to recap here; needless to say there’s a lot of time wasted about hypothetical scenarios that won’t ever happen.

The one thing that was funny was when Laura punked Jackie by saying, “Draya’s here!” at her wedding.

Look at how terrified she is. She’s looks like they just told her that the Korean wig shop was all out of wet ‘n’ wavy tracks.

Imaginary Beef Springs Up Between Bambi and Laura

Because Bambi is so thirsty to secure her spot on BBWLA, she has decided to throw her lot in with Jackie. So before the wedding, Bambi is basically stewing because she feels that Laura has disrespected Jackie by showing up late and not confirming whether she’d show up or not.

Bambi, why are you so pressed over some middle-aged woman with a rainbow tattoo and a face like Alf that you just met?

Anyway, Laura eventually shows up but she looks like she just arrived from a week in the woods. Her face is scratched up and she looks like hell. But not even five minutes after she walks through the door, Laura is forced to defend herself as Bambi accuses her of talking smack about her.

WTF?

Bambi, please work on your mixtape and stop creating imaginary beefs in your head. Is that bow too tight, ma?

The embarrassingly empty rhetoric is emblematic of the state of BBWLA; these women are hollow, dull shells of the ratchet reality TV stars we used to know.

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

In this episode, Bambi confronts Laura on her treatment of Jackie. Also, Jackie and Doug’s gay-themed wedding spectacular is nearly upstaged by one of the wives’ choice of attire.

Missed BBWLA Episode 7? Watch below!

[Yardie]

It took 6 damn episodes, but now we’re finally starting to get into the meat of this season of “Basketball Wives L.A.” Jackie Christie has been at the center of every single episode of this season and Laura Govan has curiously played a snakeish role throughout the season.

To Jackie’s face, she plays the part of the truth-telling sister who can cry on her shoulder. To the other girls, Laura trashes Jackie and her crazy old lady ways without remorse.

In episode 6, Laura reveals that she is purposely playing a two-faced game with Jackie in a bid to keep her friends close and her enemies closer. You get the feeling that Laura thinks she’s being slick and that the audience will be like, “Oooh, girl! You got her good!”

But she comes off looking just as crazy as she claims Jackie is.

Who runs around pretending to be a crazy person’s friend just to mess with them and get “revenge”? Doesn’t Laura have children to raise and husbands to steal? Dang. Let Jackie Christie breathe.

Speaking of letting things breathe, Jackie Christie probably had her diaphragm on its deathbed when she rolled up to Bambi’s concert in her spanx and Cap ‘n’ Crunch best.

There needs to be a law about women over 40 wearing pantsless outfits. This is not good for anyone’s eye sight.

Bambi Loves Her Some Auntie Jackie

For the newest bitch in the circle, Bambi sure is acting mad familiar. Unlike the other girls, Malaysia’s ride or die bitch Bambi is all about Jackie Christie.

She’s drawn to her old lady madness and when Draya and Jackie got to scrapping at the beginning of the episode, Bambi cried out, “How you gon’ fight auntie?!” Like her spirit was hurt beyond this ratchet middle aged woman having her card pulled.

So after the throwdown with Draya, Bambi quickly arranges a lunch date with Jackie to talk about what happened. Dang, Bambi picks up quick on these chicks’ tactics.

At the lunch, Jackie blathers on and on about disrespect and how she’s had it up to here with Draya. Bambi, meanwhile, practically swoons at the table and giggles like a school girl.

Does Bambi have a thing for ol’ wolf pussy Jackie? Cause we could swear she’s falling in love.

Despite just meeting Bambi, Jackie invites her to be a bridesmaid in her wedding.

What in the crazy fuck? We know that weddings hold absolutely no sacred meaning to Jackie, but damn, can she at least get to know Bambi’s government name before she invites to be a member of her wedding party?

But Jackie ain’t got time for that, she’s too excited for Bambi’s performance at the club. Her middle-aged ass can’t wait to pop, lock and drop it with the rest of these spring chickens.

Bambi’s performance was crunk and sexy. Like Ciara back in 2002. But let’s hope she has more longevity than CiCi’s had.

Jackie was doing her thing with her drink and her two-step with shady Laura and Malaysia in the VIP section, but then she randomly burst into tears talkin’ bout she missed her mother. Apparently, a street, thuggish bitch rapping in hot pink booty shorts triggers memories of the good times with her mother.

Was Jackie’s mama Frankie’s (Keyshia Cole’s mama) sister? Cause the ratchet is sounding kind of familiar.

Malaysia and Laura chalk up Jackie’s water works to being a ploy for attention. Which is probably true. But damn, couldn’t she just do desperately embarrassing sexual dance moves in the club like all the other thirsty bitches on reality TV? Sobbing always breaks the mood at a good party.

Draya Can’t Take No More

The other half of this drama revolves around Draya deciding that she’s finally going to stand up for herself. Jackie, she argues, has disrespected her.

Okay, but since when has Draya cared this much about being in high dignity and esteem? Isn’t this the same chick who made her fame and fortune sucking off famous dudes? Now she wants to demand that R-E-S-P-E-C-T like her name is Khia. C’mon now.

So yeah, Jackie and Draya are like the Tupac and Biggie of the “Basketball Wives of L.A.” They can’t stand each other but they can’t stop referencing each other either.

Not even when the kids are around!

When Brooke and Draya meet up with their respective broods for a playdate, this is refreshing because a.) We get to see these tricks do something besides sip on a drink and bite into a cobb salad and b.) We get to see them actually act as mothers.

Those kids are being babysat 90 percent of the team by grandma, so it’s good to see these chicks take a little responsibility.

But they can’t help but keep the Jackie stuff going, so they take a break to rehash all the same, stale drama on the trampolines.

Hey, at least Draya and Brooke have moved on from that King shoot incident.

Draya’s son, who was reportedly suffering from neglect when he lived in Philadelphia with Draya back in the day, looks happy and healthy, so it appears that Draya has gotten her act together as a mother.

Laura’s Plot Thickens

Jackie Christie may be a lot of things — crazy, delusional, controlling and touched — but she’s nobody’s fool.

Sensing that Laura hasn’t been completely genuine with her, Jackie confronts Laura about her talking about her behind her back. Hot damn! Jackie knows when smoke is being blown up her ass.

Laura plays it cool though and tells Jackie that whatever she says, she tells Jackie to her face. Which is a half truth. She tells Jackie the “mean things” that she knows Jackie will laugh off.

Then Laura coaches Jackie on how she should’ve fought Draya. Meanwhile, when she’s with Draya, she’s kiki-ing it up with her and laughing about how crazy Jackie is.

Who’s phony? Who’s fake?

Jackie, unfortunately, believes Laura and hugs it out with her “sister,” thinking she really has a true friend in the formerly plump Govan sister.

But thanks to the activity on Twitter, we can piece together that Laura’s attempt to turn Jackie and Draya against each other might backfire. The two appear to be on the mend on Twitter.

@jackiechristie it’s ok Jackie.Fuck twitter

— Draya Michele (@DrayaFace) October 12, 2012

So Laura had better watch her back. You never know when the tables will turn on this show.

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

READ: “Basketball Wives L.A.” Recap — Keep Your Friends Close and Your Enemies Even Closer

In this episode, tensions between Jackie and Draya hit an all-time high. Also, some of the other ladies consider not showing up for Jackie’s upcoming annual wedding.

Missed BBWLA Episode 6? Watch below!

[Yardie]

Last season of “Basketball Wives L.A.” was all about the Govan sisters, Laura and Gloria. But season 2, it’s all about Jackie Christie and Draya Michele.

The last episode ended with a lunch gone horribly wrong, with Draya walking away from Jackie’s madness.

She did, however, at least compliment Mrs. Christie on her wise choice of a salad for lunch, over say a potentially hazardous choice, like a burger and fries. See, she was being somewhat nice.

WATCH: “Basketball Wives L.A.” Season 2 Episode 5

So after lunch with Draya goes wrong, Jackie and Draya spent episode 5 going to lunch with these other bitches trying to sort things out.

Can these women go horseback riding or make some pottery or something? All they DO is sit at a bar or a lounge over some damn food. Enough is enough.

Anyway, you won’t be too shocked to learn that in the end, when Jackie joins the girls for lunch to invite them all to her annual wedding party, things go south really fast.

As soon as Draya spots Jackie’s bedraggled weave, she gets to eye rolling. And Jackie picks up on it and asks to the camera, “Oh, what’s the lil’ cow mad at now?” Well, damn.

To her credit, Jackie tried to be very polite to Draya and offered her a do-over of sorts. She said that she was unhappy with how things were left at their last lunch and said that she’s like to have the opportunity to try again with Draya.

Draya, however, told her “Bitch, please.” She’s tired of doing lunch with Jackie and she feels like Jackie doesn’t respect her and treats her like a little girl.

Jackie revealed the depths of her shade by reaching into magic bag of tricks for a lollipop, which she extended to Draya.

At that point, the drama escalated as Jackie started warning Draya that she ain’t want it with her.

Then Draya called Jackie an “old bitch” and Jackie got to callin’ Draya a ho and bam!

Fur went flying. Of course VH1 saved the good stuff for the next episode, but we saw enough of Draya and Jackie’s cat fight to whet our appetite.

The old BBWLA is finally back, y’all!

Gloria and Laura Govan Prove Water Is Thicker than Blood for Some Sisters

Apparently, in between season 1 and 2 of “BBLA” Laura and Gloria drifted apart.

The producers have been building up to this great reconciliation but despite the tears shed between the two sisters, it ultimately ends up feeling very hollow from the viewer’s perspective because we never get any kind of real insight into what their conflict was.

There is a general statement made by Gloria that “competitiveness” between the two sisters, apparently instigated by outsiders, made them stop talking to one another.

Huh? Competitiveness for what? Seeing who can break and make up with their basketball baby daddy the most?

For two sisters, who were apparently so close that they were willing to go toe to toe with Shaunie O’Neal, to suddenly STOP talking for months over “competitiveness” is beyond silly.

For Laura’s part, she says that she felt Gloria essentially went “Hollywood.”

Okay. But in order to go Hollywood, don’t you actually have to benefit from some kind of success? The only thing Gloria has been successful in is getting her failing marriage drama posted all over the gossip blogs. Is that what counts for Hollywood these days?

Anyway, in a refreshing breath of fresh air, Gloria and Laura meet up to hash their sisterly drama out over a pick-up game of basketball.

Quiet as it’s kept, Laura is apparently a real good basketball player. She certainly looks the part too in her basketball shorts and jersey. She gives that butch realness. Don’t be surprised if we find out Laura likes to put her paws in other ladies’ mousetraps, if you catch our drift.

After the game, Laura and Glo start talking about the drama and each of them accuses the other of not being there, and then Gloria drops the bombshell: SHE HAD A MISCARRIAGE. Aw, snap.

Laura’s walls came tumbling down at that point.

Realizing that there are plenty of common enemies they should be focused on taking down, the Govan sisters dap it out and decide to move on and move forward. Real G’s move in silence like lasagna and shit.

Draya’s Troll Mama and Young Daddy Pay Her a Visit

Out of nowhere, Draya’s parents pop up to pay her a visit.

If you’ll recall the stories that floated around when Draya was dating Chris Brown, her mother has been the primary caregiver for Draya’s son. And now that Draya’s living off of that “BBWLA” money, she’s ready to move her whole family out to L.A. to join her.

We hate to be rude, but Draya’s mother looks like a toothless Gremlin. Where in the Appalachian hell did Draya’s daddy find her at? And further more, why did he hit that RAW?

She over there lookin’ like the troll under the bridge that used to terrify Billy Goat Gruff and his siblings.

Meanwhile, Draya’s daddy looked like the kid whose mama up and left him behind at the department store.

He never seemed to be tuned in to the conversation, but he sure did perk up when Draya talked about moving him out there.

He apparently wasn’t there for Draya much in her childhood (which we already knew cause her ass wouldn’t have ended up as a damn stripper if she had a daddy in her life) but Draya is hopeful that he’ll make a great granddaddy.

Poor lil’ Niko (Draya’s son). That’s too much fail to absorb in one gene pool.

Frankly, if Draya’s parents do end up moving out to L.A., they’d probably make an amazing spinoff show a la Chrissy and Mr. Jones.

Jackie Plans a Gay Wedding for Her Husband

Just in case you needed a little more proof that Jackie Christie is off her rocker, this whole gay wedding she’s throwing for herself and Doug should be all the evidence anyone needs.

Despite planning and hosting a wedding for herself every year for the past 17 years, Jackie STILL insists on doing things like cake testing, even though she’s probably tasted all the damn cakes there are to taste in L.A.

She could realistically phone her order in and call it a day. But hey, this is reality TV, so Jackie makes Doug go down to the bakery and try out some damn cakes.

While they sit there nibbling on the baked goods, Jackie picks Doug’s brain about whether she should or shouldn’t invite the girls.

This whole conversation is pointless, because OF COURSE Jackie’s going to invite them. How else will she earn her paycheck?

Nonetheless, Doug doles out common sense advice: Invite them if you want, but don’t be mad if some of them don’t show.

There must be some part of the puzzle that we’re missing here, because Doug is cool, calm, collected and coherent. He’s the exact opposite of Jackie. So how the hell did he hook up with the craziest bitch in L.A.?

After the cake tasting, Jackie and Doug get a preview of the live entertainment in store for their wedding: Gogo dancers.

Jackie is alarmed when she realizes that there’s a female gogo dancer in the mix and not two men.

It’s hard to know if Doug is disappointed, he seems so enthralled by the whole thing and he happily chirps that he likes “slutty,” in response to the male gogo dancer’s question on how he’d like them to dance.

Awkward.

You know Doug’s old NBA pals are gonna have a field day with this fabulous ball.

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

READ: Basketball Wives L.A. Season 2 Episode 5 Recap – Draya and Jackie Are In A Hopeless Place

In this episode, the Christies forge ahead with their gay-themed wedding, Gloria and Laura have a wrenching heart-to-heart about growing distant, and Draya finally reaches her boiling point with Jackie.

Missed BBWLA Episode 5? Watch below!

[Yardie]

Oh hell yes. Now y’all done finally did it. The BITCH is back!

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” gave Jackie Christie an inch and ol’ girl wasted NO time taking a mile. After spending three episodes debating whether they’d let Jackie back in the circle, the girls decide to accept the Grinch back in their lives. So off they all go to Jackie’s house for the strangest pool party you’ve ever seen.

WATCH: “Basketball Wives L.A.” Season 2 Episode 4

For starters, Brooke looked like she forgot half of her swimsuit at home and just grabbed some nearby curtains and called it a day. Standing next to Gloria, she also looked like a beanstalk. Everything about this scene was very awkward.

All the girls are wearing bathing suits but interestingly nobody dipped a toe in the water. Guess they weren’t wearing their wet ‘n’ wavy hair systems that day.

To make matters even more strange, Jackie had all the girls pictures laid out next to the Costco croissants and angel food cake like it was somebody’s damn funeral. WTF? Cue the Sarah McLachlan “I Will Remember You” why don’t you?

So Draya and Jackie end up going at it because Draya feels like Jackie “disrespected” her by going straight to Gloria instead of letting Draya speak to Gloria on her behalf. Uh, ok? Do you really wanna fight over not getting to advocate for a troll like Jackie? Draya, you’re sounding mad pressed.

After the chicken squabble settles down, Jackie then sends Laura to get the ghetto Hallmark cards that she bought for each of the girls. Unfortunately, they all struggle to read her chicken scratch. Essentially, the cards read something like: Hey girl, sorry I lied on you so bad. But I LOVE YOU FOREVER BOO! XOXOXO!

As fake as it all is, the girls swallow the pill and Jackie walks away mostly pleased with everyone, except Draya. Who she feels unnecessarily cast a black cloud on the festivities.

Malaysia Is So Boring

Holy crap. Malaysia Pargo’s entire reality TV existence is like watching paint dry. These L.A. chicks have NO GOOD PLOT LINES. So instead of watching a stimulating personality on TV, we’re forced to muddy through the waters with Malaysia’s wet mop persona.

And clearly, Malaysia has no hobbies of her own, so the producers have to invent some for her. Like this lame attempt Malaysia pulls at voice acting.

WTF? Malaysia sounds drugged and medicated 90 percent of the time she speaks. Her speech is slurred and her voice is monotone as hell. On what planet would she make a good voiceover candidate?

Pity the voice acting coach, Denise Woods, who has to patiently pretend like she’s doing anything other than wasting her time with this drone.

Later in the episode, Malaysia drags Gloria to her friend’s jewelry shop so we can get a glimpse at her gaudy trinkets.

Is free promo of Malaysia’s failing businesses a part of her contract? Cause we know the viewers didn’t vote for this ghetto version of QVC as must-see TV.

Jackie Keeps Her Enemies Close

Because Jackie never tires of talking about herself and telling everyone how much she really doesn’t care about what the girls think of her (even though they’re all she can talk about), Jackie sets up ANOTHER series of lunches, meetups and outings with these chicks to have one-on-ones with them for the millionth time.

She started with her fave, the newly skinny Laura Govan. Laura, who pretty much just plays along with Jackie’s insanity at this point, had the misfortune of walking in on Jackie Christie’s sour milk cougar photo shoot.

DO NOT WANT.

Does that photographer get hazard pay, cause we don’t think it’s safe to look at that wolf pussy without eye protection.

The conversation Laura and Jackie have isn’t important. Laura mainly presses Jackie to be herself, because she feels like Jackie’s niceness is an act (which it is). And we know this because in the confessional interviews, Jackie talks about how she runs this shit and how these bitches ain’t shit.

Surely, no one is surprised.

The most productive one on one for Jackie comes with the new girl, Brooke. Like a sweet innocent lamb, Brooke innocently walks out to the big, bad wolf dressed in grandma’s costume. Jackie showers her with flatteries and beams about how similar they are. WARNING! WARNING! Jackie thinks every girl is just like her.

Brooke, however, seems to buy it hook, line and sinker. Perhaps it’s because she’s more concerned with the slight that her friend Draya dished out when she ditched her at the King photo shoot. It’s really hard to get why Brooke is dragging this out so much. She brought it up in front of the girls and then she calls Draya out AGAIN for a one-on-one lunch to talk about this damn photo shoot for the 50th time.

Bitch, did Draya steal your rent money? This is fucking ridiculous.

The two girls end up hashing things out and vow to resolve their differences in private in the future. Laughably, Draya claims that she’s really a private person. Right, is that why she signed up to put her life on display on reality TV? Maybe she and Jackie really do have something in common: delusion.

Bambi Bumps Her Gums About Brooke

Another dry beef waiting in the wings is this drawn out beef between Bambi, Malaysia’s BFF, and Brooke. Supposedly some dude that they’ve both kicked it with is involved and now it’s a case of “I heard you were talking shit about me” problems.

It’s very foolish and immature, but if maturity, intelligence and education is what you’re looking for, you’d be better off tuning in to an episode of “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” than here.

So because all these bitches do is lunch, Malaysia introduces Bambi to Laura and the three gals get right to work hashing out the issue between Bambi and Brooke. Bambi bumps her horse gums for a good while, but really it’s nothing but hot air. Nothing to see here folks, unless you’re into chicks that look like Mr. Ed.

Draya vs. Jackie: The Final Showdown

The clash of titans comes to a head by the end of the episode. If Gloria and her conniving sister, Laura, were the driving forces behind BBWLA last season, this season it’s definitely Draya and Jackie.

These two chicks can’t stand each other, but they both use each other for different reasons over and over again. Unfortunately, their alliances are always short-lived, and welp, the most recent alliance has reached its expiration date.

Draya meets Jackie for lunch (notice this repeating trend?) and Jackie let’s her know from the jump: Bitch, I ain’t like what you said at my damn pool party. Draya curtly responds that she stands by what she said about Jackie being wrong for going straight to GLoria, because she felt like it was evidence that Jackie doesn’t respect her.

Draya’s probably right here. Jackie really doesn’t respect Draya and that is why she picked up the phone and called Gloria herself. But the question is: Why does Draya want Jackie’s respect in the first place? She already knows a real friendship with Jackie isn’t viable so why go through all this effort of being mad at someone you’d rather not be friends with anyway?

Anyway, the exchange between Jackie and Draya gets hilarious, especially when Jackie pauses during their fight to pray over her meal. Draya rudely asks, “Who are you praying to?”

Jackie claps back, saying she heard that Draya was calling her SATANIC but she’s not down with “Lazarus.”

Draya, stunned by Jackie’s stupidity, asks, “WHO?!”

To which Jackie replies, “Lazarus. Satan. He has many names.”

Oh Jackie, don’t ever take your crazy away from us. We don’t know what we’d do without it.

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

READ: Basketball Wives L.A. Season 2 Episode 4 Recap – Jackie Strikes Back

In this episode, the ladies gather for a pool party, but Draya’s short temper sets Jackie off over the issue of respect. Also, Malaysia flubs a voiceover session and decides that overcoming her shyness is a top priority.

Missed BBWLA Episode 4? Watch below!

[Yardie]

You know what? For all of the noise that these gals on “Basketball Wives L.A.” make about Jackie Christie, she’s pretty much the only thing fueling this zombie train of a reality show.

When Jackie isn’t on camera talking about herself, the other women are busy gathering at restaurants, apartments and outdoor cafes to whisper about Mrs. Christie.

So for the THIRD episode in a row, we the viewers, are forced to sit and watch Malaysia half-heartedly try to bring Jackie in the circle while Gloria maintains her stiff air of disdain for Jackie.

Help. We’re drowning in boredom.

Delusion Is Her Name

We did get to see a little spark of Jackie’s trademark crazy this episode. When she was bitching and moaning with her husband Doug about their daughter Chantel flying the coop, Jackie’s deranged brain kicked in when she began to turn on Doug asking him why he didn’t do more to try to bring their daughter home by manipulating her in the way that she does.

Doug, seemingly caught off guard by his wife’s hare-brained scheme, tried to deflect the line of questioning while at the same time, avoiding tripping any wires that could set Jackie off like a grenade.

Clearly, Doug has done this before because he knows how to weather this storm and walk away scot-free.

Another great Jackie moment came when she sat down to chit chat with Malaysia and her yards of Yakki.

The conversation started out politely enough, but then Malaysia got to comparing Jackie to a crackhead auntie in the family that shouldn’t be neglected and ignored by all.

HELLO. Jackie don’t play that.

The analogy didn’t sit well with Mrs. Christie and the only thing that made her bite her tongue was that paycheck from VH1.

But she let the viewers know the real deal in the confessional when she said she doesn’t do drugs so she knows Malaysia’s comment didn’t have anything to do with her.

We smell whiffs of Whitney Houston’s famous drug denial to Diane Sawyer, when she cautioned the veteran reporter that “crack is wack.”

Frankly, it’d be better for Jackie if she just said she was on drugs. Cause otherwise, it becomes even more difficult and disconcerting to describe and explain her foolish behavior at her old age.

After bitching and moaning about her daughter Chantel busting out of the cuckoo’s nest, Jackie gets an early Christmas gift when her daughter Skypes her to let her know that she’ll be coming home after all.

What the hell? Why on earth would you walk back into the lion’s den if you successfully escaped once with all of your limbs intact? Chantel, girl, you crazy.

Draya’s Got a Crush on Gloria

With the plotlines running dry, producers are forced to pair uninteresting cast members in the hopes that somebody or something will pull some kind of noteworthy stunt.

Unfortunately, the best that Draya and Gloria can come up with is pole dancing lessons.

You see, Gloria needs to master the seductive art of the pole within two weeks for her YouTube movie. You just know this “movie” is going to be so craptacular that it’s going to make Jennifer Lopez’s “Gigli” look like an Oscar contender.

But Draya, who happens to be a creature of the night, is more than happy to instruct Gloria on the way of the pole.

Draya bounces each butt cheek with ease and swings around the pole like an ADHD kid strung out on pixie sticks would on the monkey bars.

Then, before you know it: BAM! Lap dance time.

Faster than you can say, “Make it rain!” Gloria’s bending her ass cheeks over and thrusting her pum pum in Draya’s face like she was serving peanut butter and jelly down there. Do you want a taste?

Gloria seems a bit overwhelmed by the whole lesbianish ordeal and things get even more awkward when Draya, who claims to be bisexual, confesses to Gloria that she actually hits on her all the time.

Gloria should be grateful, there are worse lesbians to be pursued by than Draya. Like Rosie O’Donnell, for starters.

Crazy Jackie Gets a Tattoo

So because Jackie Christie has nothing better to do, her old ass decides to head down to the tattoo parlor to get a new tatt in honor of her 17th marriage to her husband.

This time, however, Jackie wants to do something for “the gays,” so she’s off to a tattoo parlor to get a rainbow triangle between tribal hearts on her hip.

Draya, surprisingly acting as the voice of reason, holds her tongue and doesn’t unload on the 40-plus mother over her hideous tatt.

She even had the nerve to point at the monstrosity and tell Draya that this is her “type of thang right here.”

Next up, more talking with so and so at another restaurant and…oh hell. Look, this episode was damn boring and frankly, this show isn’t going much of anywhere.

Somebody stop this train. We want off.

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

In this episode, Jackie’s unique wedding plans and new tattoo raise eyebrows. Also, a phone call to Gloria tests Draya and Jackie’s friendship.

Missed BBWLA Episode 3? Watch below!

[Yardie]

Following in the footsteps of other reality show stars who have done music following a little TV show success, Jackie Christie — the loud-mouth, controlling, outspoken, fantasy world living “Basketball Wives L.A.” star you just love to hate (or hate to love) — has dropped a new track called “Woman of the Year.”

Yes, Jackie is definitely referring to herself as “Woman of the Year.” Who else, other than numero uno, would she consider worthy enough to hold that honor?

But it seems as though she’s willing to at least share the spotlight with other hard-working women. “The queen is on the throne, doing what I’m supposed to, All my independent women you in on this toast too,” she raps/sings under the guided direction of auto tune.

Take a listen below:

The track was reportedly recorded in honor of Jackie recently being named “Professional Woman of the Year” by the National Association of Professional Women (NAPW) for her “outstanding leadership and commitment within her profession.”

We have a feeling this song is going to come up soon on “Basketball Wives L.A.” and we can’t wait to hear what the other ladies have to say about Jackie wanting to be a singer, rapper or whatever.

Until then, enjoy Twitter’s response to Jackie’s sad attempt at a music career:

Dear GAWD, Jackie Christie’s big forehead, turkey neck ass has a song on iTunes. ????????

— Randy Thompson (@R_Tho) September 21, 2012

Jackie Christie is gonna have to get some business. Some real business. And where are her friends to tell her “that ain’t it boo”.

— glistenandtwankle (@pinksunflowuhhs) September 21, 2012

but WAAAIIITTT….who told Jackie Christie she could have a single?

— Loren (@LSS_LO) September 21, 2012

Ch…who let Jackie Christie on the booth? ‘Cash in the bra, haters in the rear’? My head hurts.

— auntie livi (@FakeGirlyGirl) September 21, 2012

This jackie christie song …. *sighs* WHY

— Beverly (@fullyBEATable) September 21, 2012

Y’all heard Jackie Christie’s new song? I canNOT deal… LMAO

— ? Chassi J ? (@PEARLfectChassi) September 21, 2012

Whooooo allowed Jackie Christie to make a song?! I can’t deal with this mad woman

— Yoko Ono (@McNatsBurger) September 21, 2012

Jackie Christie has a song? *Exits Twitter*

— Miss Parker ????(@TPTotalPackage) September 21, 2012

Let me go to work I don’t have time for this Jackie Christie mess

— Kdizzle (@Luvnmenotu) September 21, 2012

Doug, come get your wife!

[Necole Bitchie]

If there’s anything VH1′s hit reality TV series “Basketball Wives” has taught us, it’s that once you’re out of the circle, it’s tough as hell to get back in.

Unfortunately, middle-aged madwoman Jackie Christie is on the outs with all of the younger gals of “Basketball Wives L.A.” after her maniacal schemes blew up in her face at the end of last season.

So now she’s reduced to groveling for forgiveness. Cause the only thing worse than having to say sorry would be having to say goodbye to fame and relevance.

So episode 2 picks up where episode 1 left off with the scene of the girls at Gloria’s table.

Jackie, minding her p’s and q’s the whole time, attempts to build a bridge. But the girls just keep on knocking it down.

To be fair, Jackie doesn’t make it easy. She says, “I’m sorry” repeatedly, but always with qualifiers like “I’m not saying I’m sorry cause I did anything wrong” that make you think, “Bitch, is you sorry or what?”

So after a few minutes of this, Gloria gets tired of playing with Jackie the Two-Faced Hyena and sends her packing and on her way.

Even though Jackie’s a bit of a snake, you can’t help but feel a little bit bad for her as she slinks out of Gloria’s house with her tail between her legs.

Laura, however, just takes the whole thing as a joke and calls Jackie to taunt her boots and feigns that she wants her to come back.

This part started feeling very mean girls-like and crossed the line. Jackie was already being piled upon, there was no need to add insult to injury.

Even Draya, the girl with low enough morals and scruples to leave her son home alone and unattended, felt bad about how it all went down.

Video Chicks Have a Pecking Order, Dammit!

Did you know that not all video chicks are created equal? Well, Draya was here to let you know what was what.

Though she called Brooke her friend in episode 1, Draya was not interested in doing a photo shoot with her “friend” Brooke for KING magazine.

When she walked in to the shoot with Brooke, Draya immediately curled her upper lip and tried to call the photographer aside to let him know that she was not pleased, because she expected a closed set. In her mind, she’d earned the right to demand a closed set.

WTF? Draya is posing for the softcore version of Playboy which means she’s gonna be butt-ass naked and showing off all of her assets. What the hell does she have to hide at this point in her career?

Let’s call a spade a spade. Draya didn’t want Brooke’s plump, juicy rump to outshine her droopy, teardrop-shaped, deflated booty.

Hoes stay mad at Brooke’s pound cake.

But not Gloria. Brooke and Gloria have become fast friends and when Brooke invites Gloria out to another shoot of her’s (Brooke stay in front of a camera lens), she spills her guts about the Draya incident.

While wearing her fake-me-out geek glasses, Gloria vows to set up a lunch between the three of them so things can get hashed out.

Let’s hope somebody shakes a table or spills a drink at this meeting, because this season of “Basketball Wives L.A.” is drier than a She by Sheree fashion show.

When the Grinch Meets Scrooge McDuck

Laura Govan has to win the award for most self-aware reality star ever. She knows that none of these shenanigans that she and these women participate in is real life. It’s all just play-play.

Jackie on the other hand is the polar opposite. She buys into the storyline and she’s not going to let a little thing like reality get in the way of her fantasy.

So the lunch reunion between Laura and Jackie actually occurred in two completely parallel universes.

In Laura’s world (on planet Earth), she accepted Jackie for the maniacal, loose-hinged fool that she is. And Laura knows that she’s not that different from Jackie and is capable of being just as crazy as Mrs. Christie.

Laura resigns herself to the fact that she’s going to have to put up with Jackie for the duration of this season, whether she likes it or not, and decides she’ll tolerate her rather than combat her at every turn.

In Jackie’s mind (on planet Jupiter), Laura poured her heart out and extended an olive branch to rekindle their friendship.

She described the hug as though Laura embraced her like Celie embraced her long lost sister Nettie in The Color Purple. But in reality, Jackie had to coax Laura into the hug in the first place, because Laura said, “No.”

The script was already written in Jackie’s head and nothing was going to deviate her from it. This lunch was going to be her reconciliation lunch whether Laura liked it or not.

Kiss, kiss, make up and everything is alright. And just to let the cameras know that all was well for these two gal pals, Jackie immediately jumped to complimenting Laura’s jeans, telling her how cute they are.

Laura, meanwhile, is thinking to herself, “Bitch, these ain’t nothing but some old Faded Glory jeans from Walmart.”

Sowing the Seeds of Dispute

Brooke is the new girl on the block so it’s time for the “Basketball Wives” to break her in.

Malaysia meets up with Bambi, an aspiring L.A.-based rapper who she grew up with, for a “run.”

They’re dressed to the nines with at least four feet of Yaki flowing from their heads. And neither of them looks like they broke a single sweat.

But they’re yap, yapping about all the girls and Jackie’s redemption. Bambi makes a great point here that the only crime Jackie committed was talking about “bitches” behind their backs. Bambi astutely points out, “That’s what bitches do.”

Malaysia brings up Draya’s friend Brooke, and Bambi immediately turns more sour than a pitcher of lemonade.

They know of each other and while they haven’t had a direct conflict, Bambi’s itching to have a reason to snatch Brooke’s wig. Guess she wants to audition for a permanent spot on “Basketball Wives” early.

After calling Brooke a hater, the scene comes to an end. Which means that Bambi is going to have an official introduction to Brooke and the two will have words.

We can’t wait for the fireworks.

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

In this episode, Jackie’s surprise appearance at Gloria’s cooking party leaves a bad taste in everyone’s mouth. Also, Gloria lands a plum acting role and Draya’s behavior at a photo shoot irks newcomer Brooke.

Missed BBWLA Episode 2? Watch below!

[Yardie]

Many viewers and fans of “Basketball Wives LA” might feel cheated by tonight’s episode. After last year’s season premiere, which saw fistcuffs break out and weaves snatched within the first half hour, the premiere for season 2 of the VH1 spinoff of “Basketball Wives” was … lacking in adrenaline, if you will.

The season finale from the first season was all scorched earth, with Jackie Christie completely on the outs with every single girl. Even Draya, the bobble-headed, dick-riding puppet.

WATCH: Basketball Wives L.A. Season 2 Episode 1

So since there was so much damage caused from the drama of last season, the vast majority of season 2′s premiere was spent with these bitches sitting around a table and talking about shit.

There was Draya and Gloria sitting at a table, talking about how Gloria and Matt got back together.

Matt, however, never appears on camera. Perhaps he’s learned from Lamar Odom’s reality TV curse and has decided it’s best to avoid the spotlight, lest he lose his NBA career too.

So Gloria and Draya catch up (hold up, when did they start being friends in the first place?) and of course, Jackie is brought up. Throughout the whole episode, Jackie Christie is set up to be the big bad wolf.

Draya and Gloria trade smirks and roll their eyes about Jackie but Draya knows the script and she says that Jackie will be back.

Gloria also meets up with her sister, Laura, who looks like she dropped about 300 lbs.

Holy hell. Did Laura go on that Jennifer Hudson diet? Her Mrs. Potato Head body shape is completely gone. She’s a brand new woman.

Strangely, Gloria doesn’t remark on her sister’s dramatic weight loss at all. But there’s an unspoken tension here. In their confessional interviews, the Govan sisters admit that they haven’t kept in touch much over the year.

Laura got back with her baby daddy Gilbert Arenas and moved east to Orlando. But Laura hints at their tension, saying that Gloria is “hard” to talk to and calls their relationship “tainted.”

Gloria tries to play it off as though she and Laura were just to busy to keep in touch, but you know it’s as fake as the chiclet teeth in her mouth.

To ease the tension in their awkward sisterhood, the Govan sisters turn their focus to the big bad wolf, Jackie Christie. They joke about Jackie being delusional and insane, as though these two are shining examples of common sense and dignity themselves.

Jackie Christie Plots Her Comeback

God bless, Doug Christie. The man puts up with every drop of Jackie’s nutty goodness and he never, ever complains. Not one bit.

That old wolf pussy Jackie’s packing must be worth it. Cause most men would’ve checked out years ago.

But Doug patiently listens to Jackie moan about her daughter deciding she’d rather live on her own and ditch the Christie household. (Can you blame her?)

Jackie bitches to her husband that she’s bothered by her daughter’s decision because she doesn’t know who she’s with and what she’s doing.

Duh. That was the point, Mother Dearest.

Then Jackie veers to the devastating blows dealt to her ego when the girls ganged up on her last season.

Doug says she shouldn’t try to save everybody and she should just move on. But Jackie contests, saying that she misses the girls terribly.

Huh? These are bunch of twenty-something bitches (well, Laura is in her 30s, but you get it) that she was thrown together with for a damn TV show. Why is Jackie acting like she lost her sorority sisters?

But Jackie’s not done bitching and moaning, so she calls her friend Sundy over.

Yes, Sundy. It’s pronounced like the Lord’s sabbath, but spelled without the a. Don’t question it.

Poor Sundy is forced to listen to Jackie warble about how all these hoes are jealous of her lifestyle and success.

Jealous of what? Her receding hairline and weasel face? Jackie be trippin’.

And when Jackie tells Sundy that she’s glad to count Sundy as one of her true friends, you can almost see Sundy swallow a lump the size of a cantaloupe in her throat.

Being Jackie Christie’s friend is like calling a suicide bomber your friend. You never quite know when she’ll pull the strap and take everyone and herself out in one fell swoop.

But Jackie needs someone from inside the circle to pull her. So Shaunie O’Neal and VH1 producers fate steps in and Malaysia offers to pull Jackie back in.

Malaysia is the kind who easily forgives and forgets. After all, she scrapped with Laura Govan one day and broke bread with her the next.

So Malaysia feels like she can forgive Jackie Christie, even if she doesn’t forget. She tests her “let’s bring Jackie back pitch” out on Draya, who pretty much doesn’t resist.

Draya knows how the story goes and she knows that Jackie makes good TV. She’s a headache, but every reality show needs its NeNe Leakes.

After meeting with Draya, Malaysia pulls out her bedazzled phone and gives Big Sis Jackie a call.

Malaysia tells Jackie that she wants to meet up for a woman-to-woman discussion. Jackie eagerly agrees.

When the two women meet up, you can tell that Malaysia is salty as hell about Jackie, but she’s determined to maintain her place on the cast, so she has to grit her teeth and bear it with Jackie the Grinch.

The conversation between the two women goes something like this: Blah blah, bridge under the water, blah blah blah, we’re in different spaces, blah blah blah, we should be able to move forward, blah blah blah.

Jackie doesn’t admit to being a conniving, scheming witch. She maintains that she never lied, but that her mistake was in speaking at all.

Right. So she pretty much doesn’t own up to shit.

Anyway, Malaysia invites Jackie to Gloria’s house for a dinner party, and Jackie the gargoyle happily accepts the invite.

Mission accomplished.

Draya Takes Center Stage

The producers of “Basketball Wives L.A.” must’ve been feeling sorry about how Draya was absolutely savaged by the women last season, because they decided to put a halo over Draya’s head in the season premiere.

Draya, the hostess with the mostest, is now an “independent business woman.” She has her own bikini line, Mint Swim.

You see, reality TV does pay. How else would a damn video girl with nothing on her resume other than the dicks she sucked get the unmitigated gall to set up shop selling $75 bikinis?

Draya also plays the link to a new castmate on the show, the very stacked Miss Brooke Bailey.

Brooke is sleeping with Vernon Macklin, so there’s her golden ticket. As it turns out, she and Draya have crossed paths on the ho trail in the past, so they meet up and do some girl talk.

During their conversation, Draya invites the big-chested and big-assed Brooke to try on her swimsuits. So off to Draya’s house they go.

Damn, Brooke. You gon’ hit us with the armpit pose for an iPhone photo shoot though?

Draya’s bikinis struggle to cover all of Brooke’s goodies, but Brooke seems to like ‘em. They don’t look like anything you couldn’t find at Sears, but Draya seems proud of herself regardless.

Interestingly, Draya narrates a good portion of the season premiere, and as the episode goes on, the accessories on her head get more and more eccentric.

We get the hot pink Minnie Mouse bow.

Then we get the Cleopatra, Egyptian goddess royalty with her random ass head necklace.

So we can only assume an accessory line is in Draya’s near future.

All the Girls Reunite

In more “independent business woman” news, Gloria is releasing a cookbook! Gee, Teresa Giudice much, Gloria?

But Gloria swears she’s passionate about food, even though her sister Laura seems doubtful about Glo’s culinary powers.

So Gloria invites the girls over for a dinner party, so they can a taste of her tasty cuisine, which she describes as a fusion of her black-Mexican heritage and Matt Barnes’ black-Italian heritage.

Does that mean we’re gonna see chicken parmesan tacos with tabasco sauce and waffles? This could get real interesting.

Nonetheless, the girls give it the old college try. Some of the dishes simply go over the ladies’ heads.

Laura marvels as the “cornbread.” One of the women correct her and tell her it’s actually polenta. Laura shrugs and says, “whatever” and keeps it moving. Stay classy, LauGo.

While the girls dig in, the doorbell rings. The big bad wolf has arrived.

When Jackie steps into the room, jaws drop. But everyone acts cordial for the most part.

Jackie doesn’t say much and just helps herself to a plate and starts to eat. The girls find this to be a bit odd, so Malaysia finally breaks the ice by admitting that she invited Jackie over to hash things out.

Gloria looks like she wants to choke Malaysia, but she manages to pull off a smile and jokes through clenched teeth that she can’t wait to bring along a surprise guest to Malaysia’s next event.

Jackie, meanwhile, basks in all of the attention.

As Malaysia tries to tee up Jackie’s big speech, the producers ramp up the music and the dramatics and leave us hanging.

We’ll have to wait to hear Jackie’s “apology” next week. Which knowing Jackie, won’t be much of an apology as it will be a convoluted monologue about how she was merely trying to guide the little lost sheep of basketball jumpoffs.

Who runs the world? Jackie Christie, bitch.

You better recognize.

The ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” are back for season two!

Among the familiar faces who have returned for the second season of the hit VH1 reality show are Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie. Newcomers include Brooke Bailey and Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson, both joining in to make this season even more spicier than the first.

Missed the season 2 premiere of BBWLA? Watch below!

[Yardie]

Your favorite “Basketball Wives” show is making its way back to TV! The second season of VH1′s hit reality series “Basketball Wives LA” is set to premiere this September, and most of the show’s familiar faces are returning, including Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie.

Noticeably missing is Imani Showalter (she apparently left the show) … but newcomer Brooke Bailey will be filling in for her spot. Another new face shaking things up this season is Malaysia’s longtime friend Adiz “Bambi” Benson.

Find out what’s new with the ladies of “Basketball Wives L.A.” via VH1′s press release (as well as the season 2 supertrailer) below!

Sisters Laura and Gloria try to mend their strained relationship, which has been tenuous due to the pressures of their chaotic lives. Gloria faces a turning point in her acting career and finds herself at the brink of her first big role, but will this push her relationship with Laura to the edge?

Laura has a hot new figure and is set on making big life changes. Jackie attempts at making amends with the group, but has too much damage already been done?

Malaysia makes good on her promise to step out of her comfort zone and pushes herself to hang-glide, skydive and more. Draya juggles a booming modeling career and the launch of her own swimwear line.

And of course, another year means another vow renewal for Jackie and Doug Christie with the theme sure to blow the other 16 celebrations out of the water.

The all-new second season of “Basketball Wives L.A.” premieres on Monday, September 10th at 8 pm!

Now that the original “Basketball Wives” have wrapped their latest season, it’s time for the L.A. cast to show their faces … and their bikini bodies!

The ladies of BBWLA hosted a pool party at Custom Hotel in Los Angeles to celebrate new cast member Brooke Bailey‘s birthday … and (with the exception of Imani Showalter) the show’s entire cast — including Laura & Gloria Govan, Draya Michele, Malaysia Pargo and Jackie Christie — came out to support Brooke and flaunt their beach-ready bodies.

The second season of “Basketball Wives L.A.” is currently being filmed, and will make its debut on VH1 this September.

Check out the pics from the pool party below:

“Basketball Wives: L.A.” star Jackie Christie revealed in a radio interview this week that she and her husband, former NBA player Doug Christie, are getting into the porn business.

Yes, you read that right. Jackie “my husband Doug doesn’t look at other women” Chrstie, and Doug “My wife doesn’t allow me to even glance at other women” Christie want to make porn together.

But before you get too grossed out … no, Jackie and Doug will NOT be in front of the camera. (Thank God!)

The “happily married” couple (that gets re-married every year on their wedding anniversary just to prove how “happy” they are) will strictly “produce” the films from behind the camera. All acting roles will be played by porn stars.

“I’m producing an adult film, me and my husband Doug. We’re executive producing and stuff,” Jackie told radio host Rickey Smiley on his show.

Think that’s odd? Well get a load of this:

Married for more than 20 years, the Christie’s strangely obsessive marriage has been in the spotlight before. In 2002, the New York Times revealed that Doug would often signal to his wife while playing and from the bench. During the course of one game, he signaled to his wife 62 times.

Jackie even made it known to team officials when Doug was playing for the Sacramento Kings that if certain female reporters were to interview Doug, she needed to be present.

For a guy who admittedly “does not look at other women, avoiding dialogue or even eye contact,” according to the Times, it’s doubtful Christie watches porn, so we have to ask, how in the world would he be able to produce a hot adult movie?

[AVN]

Not only that, but Doug and Jackie also put out a book together called “No Ordinary Love.”

And the award for “World’s Strangest Couple” goes to …. DOUG AND JACKIE CHRISTIE!

Seriously though, these two are a complete mess…

Your thoughts?