Simon Doesn’t Have Enough Meat for Paula
American Idol star Paula Abdul insists she would never sleep with her fellow judge Simon Cowell because his manhood isn’t big enough. The singer has a love/hate relationship with English music mogul Cowell, but insists she doesn’t find him attractive. When TV host David Letterman declared Cowell believed Abdul wants to have sex with him, she laughed it off. Abdul says, “You are right about that. But that will never happen - because his nickname is ‘Small Ben’.”

Carmen Electra “Hates the Sea” ??
Carmen Electra found life on the set of Baywatch traumatic because she has a fear of water. Electra played lifeguard Lani McKenzie alongside Pamela Anderson in the hit series, but admits her time on the show was hampered by her hatred of the sea. She says, “I wasn’t the greatest swimmer in the world. It wasn’t easy trying to look good with the water getting in my eyes and up my nose.” CONTINUE READING

My my my my my! I don’t care how old Halle Berry is, my 17-year-old self would hit that! Here she is looking fine as ever at the Miami premiere for “Perfect Stranger” at AMC at Sunset Place. Usually I don’t dedicate one movie premiere post to one celebrity, but I will definitely make an exception for this beauty.

Britney Spears is supposedly facing “bankruptcy” after spending a staggering $21 million in the past two years, according to a British newspaper. The troubled pop princess is currently being treated for a substance abuse problem at California’s Promises rehab clinic. The Daily Star alleges Spears is “scared to death” of the financial situation she faces when she leaves the center, after spending two thirds of her $32 million fortune.

A family friend is quoted by the newspaper, saying, “She has to concentrate on staying sober, but she can’t do that if she has to worry about going broke - which is exactly what she thinks will happen.”

LOL, $32,000,000 - $21,000,000 = $11,000,000 right?? Hell, that’s still 6 fucking zeros! Since when is that “bankrupt?” If you don’t want it, I’ll sho’nuff take it off your hands. God only knows what you’d do with it…

In other crazy Bitch news, Britney is reportedly making even more *clears throat* male friends. She was found filling up some guy in the bushes by the tennis court. Don’t believe me? CLICK HERE! Yup, uh-huh .. she’s definitely ready to be released from rehab!

The widely hated Federal Communications Commission has received bizarre complaints about Prince’s Super Bowl half-time performance. Official moans and groans received by the FCC, following the televised spectacular last month, include one from a man who claimed the performance left him with erectile dysfunction. Another woman complained she feared Prince’s performance would turn her son gay. The pop superstar made headlines for a naughty guitar pose he made behind a huge sheet towards the end of his 15-minute performance.

Yeah, and seeing his guitar make the shape of a penis made me do some “naughty” things of my own, including, but not limited to,  touching myself and slapping my ass .. twice… Damn you Prince! Joking people … of course.

 

Chillun = children. The troubled bald “toxic” singer Britney Spears is set to leave rehab sometime this week, and some are saying that she’s made the biggest comebacks in rehab history! — Whatever that means — Some are saying she’s got her shit together and is ready to face the world again. TMZ reports that Britney Spears and K-Fed have even already come to terms on physical custody of the two kids, giving Spears back primary custody when she’s back on her feet. An inside source tells the site, “Britney has literally turned her life around.” Apparently, the turnaround for Britney has nothing to do with Spears’ former beau, Justin Timberlake. A few sites reported today that Britney Spears has literally begged Justin Timberlake to come and visit her at Promises before she leaves. Monsters and Critics reports that Britney Spears has smuggled a phone into Promises and has been making secret calls to JT.

A source told The Star, “She was hiding in a closet and talking to a guy named Justin, probably Justin Timberlake. She was talking to him about coming to support her at a group Alcoholics Anonymous meeting on Wednesday march 7 in Santa Monica. She kept saying ‘Come on Justin, please, please, please come!’ She was begging him!”

Whatever the case, I think she should keep her crazy ass in that so-called “rehab center” where they give her 24 cans of Coca-Cola everyday and listen in on her desperate phone conversations for at least another month. Who knows what she’ll do out here .. in the real world .. amongst people .. and children .. and our pets .. and whatever else one can think of… Think2wice people .. that’s all I’m saying, THINK2WICE!

A few random flicks of folks like Jada Pinkett Smith, Adam Sandler, the “Deal or No Deal” guy, Taraji P. Henson, and Bill Bellamy (who?) at the “Reign Over Me” movie premiere in NYC at the Skirball Center for the Performing Arts at NYU. Okay, I’m not gon front, I know who Bill Bellamy is, but where the hell has this cat been hiding? I haven’t heard much from him since he was Cousin Skeeter back in the day on Nickelodeon!!

TMZ is telling us that Brandy’s little brother (for those who don’t know his name is Ray-J, lol) has been offered a four-picture deal by Vivid Entertainment, the very same adult entertainment company releasing the upcoming sextape featuring the c-ball and his amazingly hot ex-girlfriend Kim Dash. Vivid Ent. is not offering him another naked role (thank God!), but is letting him mull over the idea of directing 4 pornos!

Company CEO Steven Hirsch tells TMZ, “Our first conversations were very uncomfortable, but after continuing to talk, the possibility was definitely in the air.”

Hmm … I wonder what Whitney has to say about her boo directing pornos. I can hear her now … “Aww, hell to the naw!”

Queen Latifah is letting it all hang out while getting her vacation on in these photos in Hawaii. She looks pretty secure with herself, so let’s not get started with the fat jokes … please =) Now if she decides to come out with a two-piece looking like THIS, then we have a problem! But ’til then, do your thang mama! Check out more exlusive flicks after the cut… Thanks Fai! CONTINUE READING

R&B singer Ne-Yo has written a string of songs for troubled pop star Britney Spears, but may end up giving the tracks to The Pussycat Dolls frontwoman Nicole Scherzinger. The So Sick hitmaker, 24, has written tunes for Spears, Whitney Houston, Celine Dion and Rihanna, among others, but admits the Toxic singer may not get her hands of some of the songs he originally created for her. Ne-Yo, real name Shaffer Chimere Smith, originally said he would wait for Spears to deal with her demons after she failed to attend scheduled studios sessions between the pair earlier this year.

He explains, “We set up no less than four sessions for Britney to just come and listen to the songs I wrote for her. She never showed up. I think they want me to hold these songs that I’ve written until she finishes going through her thing. But a couple might be perfect for The Pussycat Dolls’ Nicole Scherzinger, so…”

More power to ya Ne-Yo! Just like in elementary school … you move your feet, you lose your seat! Except, in this case … you lose your mind, shave your head bald, go ape on a paparazzo’s car, and get addicted to coke (the drink you fools!) you lose your potentionally #1 hit Ne-Yo songs! Shame on you Britney, shame on you!

Naomi “The Walking Menstrual Case” Campbell began a week of mopping floors at a NYC warehouse today, as part of a court-ordered 5-day community service sentence for throwing a cell phone at her housekeeper. Campbell, 36, was also ordered to attend a two-day anger management course and pay $363 to cover housekeeper Ana Scolavino’s medical expenses over the March 2006 incident, which began when Scolavino failed to locate a pair of the model’s jeans.

“Hopefully, she’ll know not to come in high heels or anything like that,” Albert Durrell, deputy chief of the Department of Sanitation, told reporters at a briefing outside the facility. “Sneakers and blue jeans are a good idea. Wearing Manolos is not.”

Oh how I’d love to watch her do this. It wouldn’t surprise me if the crazy bitch beat the hell out of this Durrell guy with the mop handle for even looking at her the wrong way. He better watch his back…